#1 humor site on the 'net

Dry Satellite

Bubba found a way to get a clearer TV signal

Dry Satellite thanks to Cathy Young

If only the eavestroughs didn't leak so much...

QuotaBills
Plans make dreams reality. - Susan Pace-Koch

Reality – what a concept! - Robin Williams

Human kind cannot bear very much reality. - T S Eliot

It wasn't raining when Noah built the ark. - Howard Ruff

Imitation is the sincerest form of television. - Fred Allen

No person has the right to rain on your dreams. - Marian Wright Edelman

People run from rain but sit in bathtubs full of water. - Charles Bukowski

Sometimes reality is too complex. Stories give it form. - Jean Luc Godard

Face reality as it is, not as it was or as you wish it to be. - Jack Welch

Sometimes the appropriate response to reality is to go insane. - Philip K. Dick

You know it's summer in Ireland when the rain gets warmer. - Hal Roach

Let's bask in television's warm, glowing, warming glow. - Homer Simpson

It's very nearly impossible to tell the truth in television. - Malcolm Muggeridge

Reality is just a crutch for people who can't cope with drugs. - Lily Tomlin

Fearful as reality is, it is less fearful than evasions of reality. - Caitlin Thomas

Life is not a problem to be solved, but a reality to be experienced. - Soren Kierkegaard

Anyone who says sunshine brings happiness has never danced in the rain. - Unknown

Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away. - Philip K. Dick

Let a smile be your umbrella, and you'll end up with a face full of rain. - George Carlin

Idealism is fine, but as it approaches reality, the costs become prohibitive. - William F. Buckley, Jr.

Satellite imagery is the only way we can map the looting patterns effectively. - Sarah Parcak

A dream you dream alone is only a dream. A dream you dream together is reality. - Yoko Ono

I hate television. I hate it as much as peanuts. But I can't stop eating peanuts. - Orson Welles

Birds find shelter during the rain, but eagles avoid rain by flying above the clouds. - Abdul Kalam

If it weren't for electricity, we'd all be watching television by candlelight. - George Gobel

I'm not crazy about reality, but it's still the only place to get a decent meal. - Groucho Marx

I'm leaving because the weather is too good. I hate London when it's not raining. - Groucho Marx

People who urge you to be realistic generally want you to accept their version of reality. - Unknown

We live in a fantasy world, a world of illusion. The great task in life is to find reality. - Irish Murdoch

So many people are on television that don't know me, and they're like experts on me. - Donald Trump

Television has changed the American child from an irresistable force to an immovable object. - Laurence J Peter

Television was not intended to make human beings vacuous, but it is an emanation of their vacuity. - Malcolm Muggeridge

You go to your TV to turn your brain off. You go to the computer when you want to turn your brain on. - Steve Jobs

If the rain spoils our picnic, but saves a farmer's crop, who are we to say it shouldn't rain? - Tom Barrett

If I don't work, I'll be sitting on the couch watching TV, eating popcorn and getting like a cow. - Celia Cruz

One of television's great contributions is that it brought murder back into the home, where it belongs. - Alfred Hitchcock

The past exists only in our memories,
The future only in our plans.
The present is our only reality. - Robert Pirsig

I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book. - Groucho Marx

A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining and wants it back the minute it begins to rain. - Mark Twain

Man alone has the power to transform his thoughts into physical reality; man, alone, can dream and make his dreams come true. - Napoleon Hill


So You Want A Day Off

Mexico Will Pay For The Wall

Behind Every Man

Truck Driver Birth

Motion Picture Selfie

FearBusters

Holy Day Inn

Fat Friend Prayer

Weather Rock - For Accurate Forecasts

Moses Parting the Ice Field

Nutella Face Lotion

Men in Denim

I Have No Time For Your Kisses, Woman

Here We Goat Again

WatchCat

Disk Drive

Unemployed Politicians

Aye Matey

Redneck Calculator

Pocket Knots

Where Do The Amish Go For A Vacation?

Life Extension

4th Dimension Bookshelf

Water Value