First Driving Lesson

Khaki: A thing for starting a car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Don't try to teach a whole course in one lesson. - Kathryn Murray

Stress should be a powerful driving force, not an obstacle. - Bob Phillips

Auto racing began 5 minutes after the second car was built. - Henry Ford

Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth. - Erma Bombeck

Safety Belt: The one you don't drink before driving home - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I had to stop driving my car for a while - the tires got dizzy. - Steven Wright

My driving abilities from Mexico have helped me get through Hollywood. - Salma Hayek

A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who has never owned a car. - Carrie Snow

Acceptance and tolerance and forgiveness; those are life-altering lessons. - Jessica Lange

We tend to steer our lives in the direction of the lessons we need to learn. - Don Campbell

A careful driver is one who honks his horn when he goes through a red light. - Henry Morgan

You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is "never try." - Homer Simpson

The lead car is absolutely unique, except for the one behind it which is identical. - Murray Walker

Sometimes when you look in his eyes you get the feeling that someone else is driving. - David Letterman

Nostalgia is like a grammar lesson: you find the present tense, but the past perfect. - Owens L. Pomeroy

Don't postpone joy until you've learned all your lessons. Joy is your lesson. - Alan Cohen

People are put into your life for reasons, for different reasons, and to teach you lessons. - Selena Gomez

Yesterday I parked my car in a tow-away zone... when I came back the entire area was missing. - Steven Wright

The lead car is absolutely, truly unique, except for the one behind it which is exactly identical. - Murray Walker

I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving. - Steven Wright

I'm going to the backseat of my car with the woman I love, and I won't be back for ten minutes. - Homer Simpson

If the lessons of history teach us anything it is that nobody learns the lessons that history teaches us. - Unknown

That men do not learn very much from the lessons of history is the most important of all the lessons of history. - Aldous Huxley

One of the many lessons that one learns in prison is, that things are what they are and will be what they will be. - Oscar Wilde

Poverty: 1. A state of mind sometimes induced by a neighbour's new car; 2. One thing that money can't buy. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

God allows us to experience the low points of life in order to teach us lessons that we could learn in no other way. - C S Lewis

I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone. - Steven Wright

I do get scared of the dentist, so a drive-through dentist might make me feel more at home. If I got to stay in my car. - Jessica Pare

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car. - Garrison Keillor

A cynic is not merely one who reads bitter lessons from the past, he is one who is prematurely disappointed in the future. - Sydney J. Harris

Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say what we really need is a car that can be shot when it breaks down. - George Carlin

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did, in his sleep. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car. - Unknown

Tonight we'll be talking to a car designer who's crossed Toyota with Quasimodo and come up with the Hatchback of Notre Dame. - Ronnie Corbett

We learn something from everyone who passes through our lives.. Some lessons are painful, some are painless... but all are priceless. - Unknown

When I was nine, my father said 'You can take piano lessons or do karate' - I had a black belt and was competing before I was 19. - Elodie Yung

The rhythm of the footsteps, the sound of whatever is coming down the ladder is driving both me and my mom steadily toward peeing our pants. - Kendare Blake

Meditation here may think down hours to moments. Here the heart may give a useful lesson to the head and learning wiser grow without his books. - William Cowper

His billiards lessons regarding double kisses, push strokes, butt caps, creeping angles of incidence, and snatches began to sound like flirting. - Jennifer Harrison

When I get real bored, I like to drive downtown and get a great parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask me if I'm leaving. - Steven Wright