#1 humor site on the 'net

First Driving Lesson

Driving starts at an early age in England

First Driving Lesson thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

Mini Coopers become Mini-er

QuotaBills
Khaki: A thing for starting a car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

But the ultimate lesson is just sit down and write. - Wole Soyinka

The first lesson reading teaches is how to be alone. - Jonathan Franzen

Stress should be a powerful driving force, not an obstacle. - Bob Phillips

You will never get lessons on swimming from a drowning man. - Unknown

Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth. - Erma Bombeck

Belonging has always been a fundamental driver of humankind. - Brian Chesky

I had to stop driving my car for a while - the tires got dizzy. - Steven Wright

Have fun, be active. Ride a bike instead of driving, for example. - Dan Buettner

The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it. - Dudley Moore

To attract men, I wear a perfume called "New Car Interior". - Rita Rudner

My driving abilities from Mexico have helped me get through Hollywood. - Salma Hayek

Acceptance and tolerance and forgiveness; those are life-altering lessons. - Jessica Lange

A careful driver is one who honks his horn when he goes through a red light. - Henry Morgan

A private railroad car is not an acquired taste. One takes to it immediately. - Eleanor R. Belmont

I've exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars. - Erma Bombeck

I spent a lot of my money on booze, birds and fast cars... the rest I squandered. - George Best

The drivers have one foot on the brake, one on the clutch, and one on the throttle. - Bob Varsha

Wealthy people miss one of life's greatest thrills: making the last car payment. - Unknown

Don't postpone joy until you've learned all your lessons. Joy is your lesson. - Alan Cohen

I have nothing but troubles with my car. Every Sunday I take my family out for a push. - Rodney Dangerfield

When I got outta High School I was driving a truck. I was just a poor boy from Memphis. - Elvis Presley

A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after. - Peter DeVries

The lead car is absolutely, truly unique, except for the one behind it which is exactly identical. - Murray Walker

If I weren't skateboarding, I'd love to race cars. I like anything that's fast and active. - Ryan Sheckler

Animals are like little children a bit. They're simple. They don't have politics driving them. - Annabelle Sabloff

I'm going to the backseat of my car with the woman I love, and I won't be back for ten minutes. - Homer Simpson

I don't think I'm a celebrity. I'm just a guy from east Texas who loves cars and airplanes. - Carroll Shelby

One of the lessons of history is that nothing is often a good thing to do and always a clever thing to say. - Will Durant

Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pick-up truck, and end up with a station wagon. - Tim Allen

One of the many lessons that one learns in prison is, that things are what they are and will be what they will be. - Oscar Wilde

Life's golden age is when the children are too old to need babysitters and too young to borrow the family car. - Unknown

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? - George Carlin

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car. - Garrison Keillor

A cynic is not merely one who reads bitter lessons from the past, he is one who is prematurely disappointed in the future. - Sydney J. Harris

She ran after the garbage truck yelling, "Am I too late for the garbage?"
The driver said, "No, jump in!" - Red Skelton

Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say what we really need is a car that can be shot when it breaks down. - George Carlin

There is a blessed necessity by which the interest of men is always driving them to the right, and making all crime mean and ugly. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

My life is the land, the dogs, the car, the motorcycle, the pond, the canoe, going to pick up mail. It's just a rural retreat that I enjoy. - Burt Shavitz

When I get real bored, I like to drive downtown and get a great parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask me if I'm leaving. - Steven Wright


Rabbi Road

Vatican Chess

Pentecost Sunday

Nun Chairs - Great Looking Legs

Organ Donor

Moldy Bible

Gyprock Prayer

Barn Art

Submarine Tea

NAACP Cover Up

Quad Shot

Princess Parking

Restaurant Wait-er

How Much Is That Doggie In The Window?

Butterfly Lens

Pike Mouth Nest

Improvise, Adapt, Overcome

Flower Lips

Bird Walker

Never Go Full Retard

Multi-Pilot Jet

Teethbrushes

Dinner Preparation: Here's looking at you!

Picture Perfect