#1 humor site on the 'net

Found The Food

When soothers and bottled milk just aren't enough

Found The Food thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

Nothing is impossible for Little Johnny

QuotaBills
Nipper: Baby crab - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I hid myself in food. - Gordon Ramsay

No one vinces me, baby - Michael Grant

Patience is the secret to good food. - Gail Simmons

Babies are such a nice way to start people. - Don Herold

Food is the most primitive form of comfort. - Sheila Graham

What poison is to food, self-pity is to life. - Oliver C. Wilson

It is a wise father that knows his own child. - William Shakespeare

Food is an important part of a balanced diet. - Fran Lebowitz

Don't pick at your food. It won't heal. - Hawkeye Pierce

A child educated only at school is an uneducated child. - George Santayana

The food in Yugoslavia is fine if you like pork tartare. - Ed Begley Jr.

One year they wanted to make me poster boy - for birth control. - Rodney Dangerfield

Food is not rational. Food is culture, habit, craving and identity. - Jonathan S Foer

Having a baby is like trying to push a grand piano through a transom. - Alice Roosevelt Longworth

There's only one pretty child in the world, and every mother has it. - English Proverb

I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick - not wounded - dead. - Woody Allen

All my life through, the new sights of Nature made me rejoice like a child. - Marie Curie

Four very powerful words to say to your child: "I believe in you." - Kevin Heath

What else is there to live for? Chinese food and women. There is nothing else! - Dudley Moore

As a child, my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it. - Buddy Hackett

We need more young people involved in farming because the future needs real food. - Helena Sylvester

Having a baby is like falling in love again, both with your husband and your child. - Tina Brown

The only time a woman wishes she were a year older is when she is expecting a baby. - Mary Marsh

The trouble with eating Italian food is that five or six days later, you're hungry again. - George Miller

I'm glad I don't have to hunt for my food. I don't even know where Sandwiches live. - Bill Murray

If we're not willing to settle for junk living, we certainly shouldn't settle for junk food. - Sally Edwards

A certificate of live birth is not the same thing by any stretch of the imagination as a birth certificate. - Donald Trump

The child should gain no request by anger; when he is quiet let him be offered what was refused when he wept. - Seneca

Let early education be a sort of amusement; you will then better be able to find out the natural bent of the child. - Plato

There's no such thing as a tough child - if you parboil them first for seven hours, they always come out tender. - WC Fields

Sea spaghetti looks like dark fettuccine and has a similar texture - you can get it in health food stores or online. - Yotam Ottolenghi

Since people are going to be living longer and getting older, they'll just have to learn how to be babies longer. - Andy Warhol

Children are smarter than any of us. Know how I know that? I don't know one child with a full time job and children. - Bill Hicks

Every time a child says, "I don't believe in fairies," there is a little fairy somewhere that falls down dead. - Sir James M. Barrie

Any fool can have a child. That doesn't make you a father. It's the courage to raise a child that makes you a father. - Barack Obama

Babies are bits of stardust, blown from the hand of God. Lucky the woman who knows the pangs of birth, for she has held a star. - Larry Barratto

I like a well-roasted rotisserie chicken and eggs cooked various ways like sunny-side up or scrambled. It's comfort food for me. - Joel Robuchion

I think, at a child's birth, if a mother could ask a fairy godmother to endow it with the most useful gift, that gift should be curiosity. - Eleanor Roosevelt

The heart of who I am as a person and as a man is forgiveness, after forgiving my father for a lot of things that were done when I was a child. - Tyler Perry


Holy Day Inn

Fat Friend Prayer

Weather Rock - For Accurate Forecasts

Moses Parting the Ice Field

Nutella Face Lotion

Men in Denim

FearBusters

I Have No Time For Your Kisses, Woman

Here We Goat Again

WatchCat

Disk Drive

Unemployed Politicians

Aye Matey

Redneck Calculator

Pocket Knots

Where Do The Amish Go For A Vacation?

Life Extension

4th Dimension Bookshelf

Water Value

Flexible Toothbrush

Redneck Dent Repair

Veterinarian or Taxidermist?

Same Sex Marriage in Canada

CardboardZilla