#1 humor site on the 'net

Granny Smith Apple

How apples show their age

Granny Smith Apple thanks to Keith Blake

QuotaBills
Grammatical Error: When Grandma screws up - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The apple will fall under the apple tree. - Greek Proverb

One good egg in a barrel of rotten apples. - Archie Bunker

There is no place like home - except Grandma's. - Unknown

An apple a day keeps anyone away if you throw it hard enough. - Unknown

Millions saw the apple fall, but Newton was the one who asked why. - Bernard Baruch

Grandma, thank you for being my anchor in this stormy sea of life. - Unknown

If it weren't for my adam's apple, I'd have no shape at all. - Phyllis Diller

That's the formaldehyde. That's why Granny's so well-preserved. - Robin Williams

Apple: Nutritious lunchtime dessert which children will trade for cupcakes. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

If you want to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe. - Carl Sagan

My favourite place to eat is my grandma's kitchen. She makes a mean crab cake. - Karlie Kloss

In Hollywood, the women are all peaches. It makes one long for an apple occasionally. - W Somerset Maugham

Even if I knew that tomorrow the world would go to pieces, I would still plant my apple tree. - Martin Luther

Every thought is a seed. If you plant crab apples, don't count on harvesting Golden Delicious. - Bill Meyer

Grandma always made you feel she had been waiting to see you all day and now the day was complete. - Marcy DeMaree

Spare the rod and spoil the child - that is true. But, beside the rod, keep an apple to give him when he has done well. - Martin Luther

As a family we couldn't decide whether to have Grandma buried or cremated, so in the end we decided to let her live. - Gary Delaney

Facebook is in a very different place than Apple, Google, Amazon, Samsung, and Microsoft. We are trying to build a community. - Mark Zuckerberg

Blind dates are treacherous. You don't know who this person is. You wonder, "Should I call my grandma during coffee to get out of this?" - Alan Alda


Get Off Your High Horse

Redneck Towing

Revenge of the Stallion

2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Rat Cut

Spot the Hidden Barred Owl

Smoking Hot Body

Billy the Eagle Owl

Star Wars Fisherman

The Devil's Swimming Pool

Pet Dentist

Nuts And Fruitcakes

Spiral Staircase

Scubaru

Nordern Minnesota Yeneral Store

Pigeon Drink

Epic Turban

Healthy Breakfast

Motorcycle Campers

Canadian Banknotes - Extreme Makeover For Toonie

Wheelchair Mower

How To Fail at Photoshopping Pictures

Life Expectancy by Age

Construction Clouds