#1 humor site on the 'net

Late Lecture

Preparing for a late night confrontation

Late Lecture thanks to Keith Blake

Late timing leads to elderly showdown

QuotaBills
To stop aging, keep on raging. - Michael Forbes

Old age is the verdict of life. - Amelia E Barr

Pity is just another form of abuse. - Michael J. Fox

I'm not aging, I'm marinating. - Unknown

We are never to judge a philosophy by its abuse. - Augustine

Aging wrinkles the body. Quitting wrinkles the soul. - Douglas MacArthur

The gods bestowed on him the gift of perpetual old age. - Oscar Wilde

Old age is not so bad when you consider the alternative. - Maurice Chevalier

Herb is the healing of a nation, alcohol is the destruction. - Bob Marley

Aging seems to be the only available way to live a long life. - Daniel F E Auber

The old age of an eagle is better than the youth of a sparrow. - Proverb

I'm aging like fine wine. I'm getting complex and fruity. - Unknown

Old age is the most unexpected of all things that happen to a man. - Leon Trotsky

I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me. - Winston Churchill

Don't let aging get you down. It's too hard to get back up. - John Wagner

Cherish all your happy moments: they make a fine cushion for old age. - Christopher Morley

Old age at least gives me an excuse for not being very good at things. - Thomas Sowell

Don't abuse your friends and expect them to consider it criticism. - Ed Howe

I phoned my Dad to tell him I had stopped smoking. He called me a quitter. - Steven Pearl

I will never be an old man. To me, old age is always 15 years older than I am. - Francis Bacon

We look forward to a disorderly, vigorous, unhonored and disreputable old age. - Don Marquis

More people would live to a ripe old age if they weren't too busy providing for it. - Unknown

There is no pleasure worth forgoing just for an extra three years in the geriatric ward. - John Mortimer

Aging is the extraordinary process where you become the person you always should have been. - David Bowie

You can lead audiences to a half-dressed, aging pop star but you can't make them watch. - Megan Basham

My comfort is, that old age, that ill layer-up of beauty, can do no more spoil upon my face. - William Shakespeare

I don't drink these days. I am allergic to alcohol and narcotics. I break out in handcuffs. - Robert Downey Jr.

When grace is joined with wrinkles, it is adorable. There is an unspeakable dawn in happy old age. - Victor Hugo

Every form of addiction is bad, no matter whether the narcotic be alcohol or morphine or idealism. - Carl Jung

To keep the heart unwrinkled, to be hopeful, kindly, cheerful, reverent - that is to triumph over old age. - Thomas Bailey Aldrich

Old age is like a plane flying through a storm. Once you are aboard, there is nothing you can do about it. - Golda Meir

While we drink, and call for garlands, for perfumes and for maidens, old age is creeping on us unperceived. - Juvenal

The secret of genius is to carry the spirit of the child into old age, which means never losing your enthusiasm. - Aldous Huxley

If you resolve to give up smoking, drinking and loving, you don't actually live longer; it just seems longer. - Clement Freud

There is more refreshment and stimulation in a nap, even of the briefest, than in all the alcohol ever distilled. - Ovid

I have this theory that chocolate slows down the aging process. It may not be true, but do I dare take the chance? - Unknown

Lord save us all from old age and broken health and a hope tree that has lost the faculty of putting out blossoms. - Mark Twain

I have made an important discovery - that alcohol, taken in sufficient quantities, produces all the effects of intoxication. - Oscar Wilde

I definitely believe marijuana helps with menstruation. Since I started smoking pot, my girlfriend’s period has become painless for me. - Randy Kagan

When you have police officers who abuse citizens, you erode public confidence in law enforcement. That makes the job of good police officers unsafe. - Mary F Berry


Work At Home Mom

German Car Parkade

Dog Face or Dog Butt?

Trunk Minions

Despicable Watermelon

New Parking Spot For Women

Popcorn Cremation

Time Is Free

Fishing Trip in New Zealand

Happy 4th of July

Click Click Imaging Specialists

Awkward

Soldier Salute

You Turn

Australia 101 For Tourists

Horse Wood Sculpture

Changing Priorities Ahead

Fishing With Moses

Expired Marriage

Goose Walkers

Minion HotHead

Christopher Walken

Greek Financial Path

Miss Afghanistan Finalists