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Monsoon TV

Nothing gets in the way of a good Bollywood re-run

Monsoon TV thanks to Barry McCartney

India celebrities take precedence over Monsoon disasters

QuotaBills
Save water - drink vodka. - Unknown

Flood: A river too big for its bridges - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Friendship is a plant we must often water. - German Proverb

Television has raised writing to a new low. - Samuel Goldwyn

Imitation is the sincerest form of television. - Fred Allen

Kids don't remember their best day of television. - Unknown

Be on your guard against a silent dog and still water. - Latin Proverb

Nothing is really real unless it happens on television. - Daniel J. Boorstin

People run from rain but sit in bathtubs full of water. - Charles Bukowski

I believe in getting into hot water; it keeps you clean. - G K Chesterton

Life doesn't imitate art; it imitates bad television. - Woody Allen

Bed is like the womb, only drier and with better TV reception. - Linda Richman

I moved to Florida because you don't have to shovel water. - James Randi

Everyone has a purpose in life. Perhaps yours is watching television. - David Letterman

My children refuse to eat anything that hasn't danced on television. - Erma Bombeck

My wife's an earth sign. I'm a water sign. Together we make mud. - Henny Youngman

Jogging is for people who aren't intelligent enough to watch television. - Victoria Wood

You can lead a horse to water but I'd rather ride it to the liquor store. - Wayne Nowazek

A woman is like a teabag. Only in hot water do you realize how strong she is. - Nancy Reagan

Warm Water Theorem: When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Do you realize if it weren't for Edison we'd be watching TV by candlelight? - Al Boliska

If it weren't for electricity, we'd all be watching television by candlelight. - George Gobel

For those of you watching who do not have television sets, live commentary is on Radio 2. - David Coleman

I wanted this to be a movie on TV so I could press the off button and make it all go away. - Michelle Rowen

If NASA really wants to find water on Mars, they should just send me there to hit a golf ball. - Gene Jaster

Just as Jesus created wine from water, we humans are capable of transmuting emotion into music. - Carlos Santana

What is harder than rock, or softer than water? Yet soft water hollows out hard rock. Persevere. - Ovid

President Ford tells us all to bite the bullet and Betsy Ford goes on TV and shoots off her mouth. - Archie Bunker

When your shot has to carry over a water hazard, you can either use one more club or two more balls. - Unknown

You go to your TV to turn your brain off. You go to the computer when you want to turn your brain on. - Steve Jobs

TV and the Internet are good because they keep stupid people from spending too much time out in public. - Douglas Coupland

Sailor: 1. A man who makes his living on water but never touches it on shore; 2. A wolf in ship's clothing. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The last fight was my fault though. My wife asked, "What's on the TV?"
I said, "Dust!" - Red Skelton

Be ruthless about your calendar - stick to it, hell or high water but create space for unstructured time as well. - Arjun Arora

It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I managed to squeeze in eight hours of TV a day. - Homer Simpson

How come if you mix flour and water together you get glue? And when you add eggs and sugar you get cake? Where does the glue go? - Rita Rudner

From a drop of water a logician could infer the possibility of an Atlantic or a Niagara without having seen or heard of one or the other. - Arthur Conan Doyle

I put my air conditioner in backwards. It got cold outside. The weatherman on TV was confused. "It was supposed to be hot today." - Steven Wright

The best way to meet a woman is in an emergency situation - if you're in a shipwreck, or you find yourself behind enemy lines, or in a flood. - Mark Helprin

If one morning I walked on top of the water across the Potomac River, the headline that afternoon would read: "President Can't Swim." - Lyndon B. Johnson


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