#1 humor site on the 'net

Parking Privilege

Lots of parking for those who don't park a lot

Parking Privilege thanks to Keith Blake

Standing up for one's Strata rights

Parking Privilege thanks to Keith Blake

QuotaBills
Property is robbery. - Latin Proverb

Afford: Popular type of car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Parking is such street sorrow. - Herb Caen

There are no traffic jams on the extra mile. - Zig Ziglar

She died doing what she loved, taking a selfie in traffic. - Unknown

Auto racing began 5 minutes after the second car was built. - Henry Ford

Honor is not the exclusive property of any political party. - Herbert Hoover

The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it. - Dudley Moore

We all thought we'd have flying cars by now, but we don't. - Dana Brunetti

To attract men, I wear a perfume called "New Car Interior". - Rita Rudner

All I need to make a comedy is a park, a policeman, and a pretty girl. - Charlie Chaplin

A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who has never owned a car. - Carrie Snow

When a police officer tells you to stay in the car, you stay in the car. - Reese Witherspoon

Americans will put up with anything provided it doesn't block traffic. - Dan Rather

You don't have to carry a designer bag that costs more than a car to look cool. - Kesha

The lead car is absolutely unique, except for the one behind it which is identical. - Murray Walker

Wealthy people miss one of life's greatest thrills: making the last car payment. - Unknown

A guy knows he’s in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days. - Tim Allen

I have nothing but troubles with my car. Every Sunday I take my family out for a push. - Rodney Dangerfield

When neither their property nor their honor is touched, the majority of men live content. - Niccolo Machiavelli

I'm the only woman who can walk in Central Park at night... and reduce the crime rate. - Phyllis Diller

A real patriot is the fellow who gets a parking ticket and rejoices that the system works. - Bill Vaughan

I look just like the girls next door... if you happen to live next door to an amusement park. - Dolly Parton

Standing in the middle of the road is very dangerous; you get knocked down by traffic from both sides. - Margaret Thatcher

If you haven't seen your wife smile at a traffic cop, you haven't seen her smile her prettiest. - Kin Hubbard

It's much easier to double your business by doubling your conversion rate than doubling your traffic. - Bryan Eisenberg

There are two things in this world that don't last long: dogs chasing cars, and pros putting for pars. - Lee Travino

In neighborhoods without a usable park or playground, the incidence of childhood obesity increases by 29 percent. - Darell Hammond

Life's golden age is when the children are too old to need babysitters and too young to borrow the family car. - Unknown

For all of the fights I have had in my life, both on and off the ice, I have only been in the back of a cop car once. - Tie Domi

I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone. - Steven Wright

If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 2,000 MPG. - Bill Gates

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car. - Garrison Keillor

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say what we really need is a car that can be shot when it breaks down. - George Carlin

A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad. - Theodore Roosevelt

Now that women are jockeys, baseball umpires, atomic scientists, and business executives, maybe someday they can master parallel parking. - Bill Vaughan

A car hits a Jewish man. The paramedic rushes over and says, "Are you comfortable?" The guy says, "I make a good living." - Henny Youngman

My life is the land, the dogs, the car, the motorcycle, the pond, the canoe, going to pick up mail. It's just a rural retreat that I enjoy. - Burt Shavitz

The judge asked, "What do you plead?" I said, "Insanity, your honour, who in their right mind would park in the passing lane?" - Steven Wright


Adultery

2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Moses' USB Tablets

Virus Update

Carnations vs. Roses

Waterproof Notepad

Sudoku Cats

Harlie's Angel

Ladder Load

Road To Nowhere

Bartender Mechanic

Promote Yourself

Noteable Bartender

Microsoft Innovation

Complaint Jar

First Selfie

Leave My Drink Alone

Great Scott!

Golden End of the Rainbow

Big Blade Snow Plow

Emergency Bridge Repair Team

A Fish Called Wanda - Uncut Version

Boat Launch

Redneck Motorcycle Transport