#1 humor site on the 'net

Perfect Ad Placement

Best way to advertise last minute cruise deals

Perfect Ad Placement thanks to Keith Blake

When business starts falling, prices start dropping

QuotaBills
I don't give a ship! - Unknown

Vice Versa: Dirty Italian poetry - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Italy is a geographical expression. - Prince Metternich

I hope my ship comes in before my dock rots. - Unknown

Old and young, we are all on our last cruise. - Robert Louis Stevenson

Take a cruise down to the Virgin's Island. - Archie Bunker

BANG - A four-letter Italian word for good-bye. - Archie Bunker

Anyone can steer the ship when the sea is calm. - Publilius Syrus

Zinc: What a ship will do if it has a hole in it - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

If your ship doesn't come in, swim out to it. - Jonathan Winters

Oregano: The ancient Italian art of pizza folding - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

There is no place like home - except Grandma's. - Unknown

Tell the men to fire faster and not give up the ship. - Captain James Lawrence

Grandma, thank you for being my anchor in this stormy sea of life. - Unknown

If it is your time, love will track you down like a cruise missile. - Lynda Barry

I have a feeling that when my ship comes in I'll be at the airport. - Charles Schulz

An entire ocean can't sink a ship unless it allows the water inside. - Donna Smith

Italy is the home of art and swindling; home of religion and moral rottenness. - Mark Twain

I imagine hell like this: Italian punctuality, German humour and English wine. - Peter Ustinov

When rats leave a sinking ship, where exactly do they think they're going? - Douglas Gauck

Perspective is to painting what the bridle is to the horse, the rudder to a ship. - Leonardo da Vinci

My favourite place to eat is my grandma's kitchen. She makes a mean crab cake. - Karlie Kloss

To God I speak Spanish, to women Italian, to men French, and to my horse - German. - Emperor Charles V

If you're offered a seat on a rocket ship, don't ask what seat! Just get on. - Sheryl Sandberg

The ship is safest when it is in port, but that's not what ships were built for. - Paulo Coelho

Neither should a ship rely on one small anchor, nor should life rest on a single hope. - Epictetus

The man without a purpose is like a ship without a rudder - a waif, a nothing, a no man. - Thomas Carlyle

That's how ya got your Chinatown, your Harlems, your Little Italy... all them grettos. - Archie Bunker

When I was a child, I wanted to raise horses in Wyoming or be a cabin boy on a pirate ship. - Sadie Jones

If the highest aim of a captain were to preserve his ship, he would keep it in port forever. - Thomas Aquinas

No one would have ever crossed the ocean if they could have gotten off the ship in the storm. - Charles F. Ketterling

The trouble with eating Italian food is that five or six days later, you're hungry again. - George Miller

Bountiful: What Captain Bligh declared after learning that one more breadfruit tree would sink his ship - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I'm Irish on St. Patrick's Day. I'm Italian on Columbus Day. I'm a New Yorker every day. - Tamara Tunie

Sailor: 1. A man who makes his living on water but never touches it on shore; 2. A wolf in ship's clothing. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

As a family we couldn't decide whether to have Grandma buried or cremated, so in the end we decided to let her live. - Gary Delaney

Mexican, Mediterranean, Italian, sushi, I love it all. Put it on a plate, and as long as I know what it is, I will eat it. - Camren Bicondova

Most people stand on the dock of life waiting for their ship to come in when deep down inside they know it has never left port. - Zig Ziglar

He who loves practice without theory is like the sailor who boards ship without a rudder and compass and never knows where he may cast. - Leonardo da Vinci

You know that ISIS wants to go in and take over the Vatican? You have heard that. You know, that's a dream of theirs, to go into Italy. - Donald Trump


Dragon Playground

Redneck Boat Ramp

Jack-A-Lope vs Jack-E-Lope

Urleen

Carry On or Carrion?

Selfie Pilot

Monarch Butterflies - Starting a Monarchy

Air Couch

Europe Road Trip

Thongthing Special

Nighttime Graffiti

Baby Formula

Kid Suction

Redneck Moving Truck

Critter Control

Lost Dog

Nail Chair

Looking For Something?

Yellow Pet

Race Break

Fuse Bypass

Good Boy

British Tea Party

Roadside Assistance