#1 humor site on the 'net

Pool Apartments

Deckside pool with out-standing view

Pool Apartments thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

Your own private beach off the front room

QuotaBills
Turkish Bath: A pool room - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Only dead fish swim with the stream. - Malcolm Muggeridge

Beach Erosion: A case of bad tidings - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A smooth sea never made a skilled sailor. - English Proverb

I love shark week, all kids swim for free. - Josh Stern

Quicksand: Beach where motor races are held - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A lot of people attack the sea. I make love to it. - Jacques Cousteau

Time is like the ocean, always there, always different. - Ogden Nash

When I go to the beach, even the tide won't come in. - Phyllis Diller

The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard. - Steven Wright

I'm walking backwards for Christmas Across the Irish Sea. - Spike Milligan

The cure for anything is salt water - sweat, tears or the sea. - Isak Dinesen

Along this track of pathless ocean it is my intention to steer. - Christopher Columbus

Live in the sunshine
Swim in the sea
Drink the wild air - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Leadership, like swimming, cannot be learned by reading about it. - Henry Mintzberg

Some people could look at a mud puddle and see an ocean with ships. - Zora N Hurston

The man who is swimming against the stream knows the strength of it. - Woodrow Wilson

To be born in India is to arrive into the world swimming in religion. - Ravi Zacharias

An entire ocean can't sink a ship unless it allows the water inside. - Donna Smith

I have spent most of my life playing pool. The rest of it, I have wasted. - Unknown

A dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to swim upstream. - WC Fields

Life is like stepping onto a boat which is about to sail out to sea and sink. - Shunryi Suzuki-roshi

Let me be an ocean and let me kiss you as many times as the ocean kisses the shore. - Debasish Mridha

People who drink to drown their sorrow should be told that sorrow knows how to swim. - Ann Landers

I have often wanted to drown my troubles, but I can't get my wife to go swimming. - Jimmy Carter

All great calamities on land and sea have been traced to inspectors who did not inspect. - Kin Hubbard

I could never learn to like her, except on a raft at sea with no other provisions in sight. - Mark Twain

I guess you would say I'd be like the Michael Phelps of swimming if he wasn't there. - Ryan Lochte

No one would have ever crossed the ocean if they could have gotten off the ship in the storm. - Charles F. Ketterling

Language is our meeting place, the sea we live in... it is the common ground of our humanity. - Toby Wolfe

I think 99 times and find nothing. I stop thinking, swim in silence, and the truth comes to me. - Albert Einstein

I keep fit. Every morning, I do a hundred laps of an Olympic-sized swimming pool - in a small motor launch. - Peter Cook

If you are in the job for glamour, you're in for the shock of your life. The media is a huge shark pool. - Trisha Goddard

I don't trust the ocean, either; it would kill me as soon as not. It doesn't mean I'm afraid of it. - Maggie Stiefvater

My life amounts to no more than one drop in a limitless ocean. Yet what is any ocean, but a multitude of drops? - David Mitchell

Sea spaghetti looks like dark fettuccine and has a similar texture - you can get it in health food stores or online. - Yotam Ottolenghi

Happiness consists in activity: such is the constitution of our nature; it is a running stream, and not a stagnant pool. - John M. Good

The trout enjoys the river,
The whale enjoys the sea,
And dogs love most an old lamp-post,
But you're my cup of tea. - W H Auden

You must not lose faith in humanity. Humanity is like an ocean; if a few drops of the ocean are dirty, the ocean does not become dirty. - Mohandas Gandhi

If one morning I walked on top of the water across the Potomac River, the headline that afternoon would read: "President Can't Swim." - Lyndon B. Johnson


LippoPotumus

Haircut For Staff Meetings

Wolf Mode

Undertaker Bike

Throwaway Sport Paper

Pacman Skeleton

Vatican City's New Breakfast Special

Flying Cathedral Excuse

Day At The Beach

John The Baptist Souvenirs

Amish Prom Limo

Wishy-Washy Church

'Cover Girl' Magazine

One At A Time

Shofar So Good

Temple Car

Closing Time

Wine Glass Lanyard

Awning Truck Advertising

Plugged In

Org Chart - Simplified Version

Extreme Value

Instant Acrophobia

How To Hire Engineers