#1 humor site on the 'net

Rat Cut

What pet would you like to keep a-head of?

Rat Cut thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

On cold days, Jethro uses a hat on his rat

QuotaBills
A wig is a wig is a wig. - Billy Zane

Long on hair, sort on brains. - French Proverb

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard? - George Carlin

The drowning man grips to his own hair. - Greek Proverb

Honeycomb: Hair styling tool used by bees - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Never ask the barber if you need a haircut. - Warren Buffett

A hair on the head is worth two on the brush. - Oliver Herford

A squirrel is just a rat with a cuter outfit. - Sarah J. Parker

Is that a beard, or are you eating a muskrat? - Dr Gonzo

You're only as good as your last haircut. - Fran Lebowitz

He doesn't dye his hair, he bleaches his face. - Johnny Carson

I feel old when I see mousse in my opponent's hair. - Andre Aggassi

You can't compete with a six foot five man in a wig. - Shemar Moore

Let the wind blow through your hair while you still have some. - Dave Weinbaum

Why don't you get a haircut? You look like a chrysanthemum. - P G Wodehouse

A lame cat is better than a swift horse when rats infest the palace. - Chinese Proverb

I have little hair because my brain is so big it pushes the hair out. - Silvio Berlusconi

If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in the library? - Lily Tomlin

I used to think I'd like less grey hair. Now I'd like more of it. - Richie Benaud

People think a Muslim has to have a turban or a big beard. It's stupid. - T-Pain

The whiter my hair becomes, the more ready people are to believe what I say. - Bertrand Russell

Actually, I comb my hair quite often. Of course, I use an electric toothbrush. - Phyllis Diller

The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat. - Lily Tomlin

When rats leave a sinking ship, where exactly do they think they're going? - Douglas Gauck

As long as I can wear a wig I can be any character, and in real life I can be myself. - Ginnifer Goodwin

I get more distracted by hair or a really bad wig than I do costumes any day of the week. - Colleen Atwood

I slipped at a bus stop; I went one way and my hair went the other. That was the end of my wig. - Tia Carrere

I love to put on a wig, a costume, inhabit a different world and be called something different. - Susan Egan

I like to put on a wig or a fake mustache and do something silly with friends, do a little dance. - Tom Lenk

Too bad all the people who know how to run this country are busy running taxicabs or cutting hair. - George Burns

Many of us are at the 'metallic' age - gold in our teeth, silver in our hair, and lead in our pants. - Unknown

Our oldest son was trying to find himself for about a year. Then one day he got a haircut, and found himself. - Phil Callaway

You really just want to know that somebody loves you for you. Sometimes you feel like an ATM machine with a wig on it. - Mariah Carey

Her capacity for family affection is extraordinary: when her third husband died, her hair turned quite gold from grief. - Oscar Wilde

Laundry's easier when you live alone. Fifteen minutes before a date, put 'em on, dry 'em with a hair blower. - Elayne Boosler

Kissing a man with a beard is a lot like going to a picnic. You don't mind going through a little bush to get there! - Minnie Pearl

As a travel writer I've specialized in gritty, fearful destinations, the kind of places that make a reader's hair stick on end. - Tahir Shah

You know, sometimes I feel well and vital in the world, and sometimes I just feel so distressed I want to pull my hair out by the roots. - Sharon Stone

Beauty isn't worth thinking about; what's important is your mind. You don't want a fifty-dollar haircut on a fifty-cent head. - Garrison Keillor

The research rat of the future allows experimentation without manipulation of the real world. This is the cutting edge of modeling technology. - John Spencer


Pacman Skeleton

Vatican City's New Breakfast Special

Flying Cathedral Excuse

Day At The Beach

John The Baptist Souvenirs

Amish Prom Limo

Wishy-Washy Church

'Cover Girl' Magazine

One At A Time

Shofar So Good

Temple Car

Closing Time

Wine Glass Lanyard

Awning Truck Advertising

Plugged In

Org Chart - Simplified Version

Extreme Value

Instant Acrophobia

How To Hire Engineers

Business School Basics

Waterwheel Rotisserie

Elephant Bus

Promote Yourself

Time Machine