Redneck Adjustable Shower

Hollywood is like Picasso's bathroom. - Candice Bergen

I don't sing in the shower. I perform. - Unknown

What happens in the hot tub stays in the hot tub. - Aussie Swimmer

We cannot direct the wind, but we can adjust the sails. - Bertha Calloway

Oh, that sound? I'm in the hot tub, reading a novel. - Jane Smiley

I would rather sleep in a bathroom than in another hotel. - Billy Wilder

The kitchen. The bathroom. The yin and yang of the household. - David C. Holley

Everyone makes fun of the Redneck until the Zombie Apocalypse. - Unknown

There's a lot involved in going to the bathroom for women. - Leah Remini

If you want to see a comic strip, you should see me in the shower. - Groucho Marx

Every bathroom in my house will ultimately have a Toto bidet in it. - Ken Marino

My grandmother took a bath every year, whether she was dirty or not. - Brendan Behan

Yachting: standing in a cold shower tearing up hundred-dollar bills. - Unknown

Running is an unnatural act, except from enemies and to the bathroom. - Unknown

I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and radio. - Rodney Dangerfield

I threw the kitchen sink at him, but he went to the bathroom and got his tub. - Andy Roddick

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy

When I was younger I used to lock myself in the bathroom and read in the dry tub. - Karen Russell

I'd rather be able to face myself in the bathroom mirror than be rich and famous. - Ani DiFranco

At Disneyland, you never go 'backstage' - even when you're in the bathroom. - Hideo Kojima

The cure for a broken heart is simple, my lady. A hot bath and a good night's sleep. - Margaret George

I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance - waiting for the bathroom. - Bob Hope

Music Lover: A man, who upon hearing a soprano in the bathroom, puts his ear to the keyhole - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I can't change the direction of the wind but I can adjust my sails to reach my destination. - James Dean

Basically my wife was immature. I'd be in my bath, and she'd come in and sink my boats. - Woody Allen

For short term relaxation, I take a hot tub. It's my best way to unblock writer's block. - Ellen Hopkins

You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather. - Jeff Foxworthy

At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom. - George Carlin

I do like to read in bed, but because I have two kids I'm often forced to read in the bathroom. - Eoin Colfer

Field hockey is my strongest sport, and if I lose a game, I take a long, hot bath and moan about it. - Emma Watson

For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have her and his own bathroom. The end. - Catherine Zeta-Jones

I sleep with a light on in the bathroom so I can see where I'm at, because I wake up and have no clue. - Carrie Underwood

Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth, then it just becomes a soap opera. - Unknown

The best measure of a man's honesty isn't his income tax return. It's the zero adjust on his bathroom scale. - Arthur C. Clarke

I wish I had a nickel for every song that I've left in the bathroom, written down on a matchbox, or just totally forgotten about. - Tommy Shaw

Mancation: A man's vacation. Generally includes lots of beer, a Redneck grill, slabs of meat for cooking and a sack of fireworks. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Take a music bath once or twice a week for a few seasons, and you will find that it is to the soul what the water bath is to the body. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, "If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?" - Steven Wright

I've got this thing for spicy stuff. Now, if you give me hot chocolate with chili pepper, a book and a bubble bath, I'm a happy girl. - Shiloh Walker

Dogs display reluctance and wrath
If you try to give them a bath;
They bury bones in hideaways
And half the time they trot sideaways. - Ogden Nash