#1 humor site on the 'net

Ruined Bacon

Green cuisine evens out calory count

Ruined Bacon thanks to Howard Chapman

Bubba's fancy food presentation attracts hecklers

QuotaBills
Food is the most primitive form of comfort. - Sheila Graham

Fame is a fickle food upon a shifting plate. - Emily Dickinson

Compromises are for relationships, not wine. - Robert S Caywood

What poison is to food, self-pity is to life. - Oliver C. Wilson

Assumptions are the termites of relationships. - Henry Winkler

Queuing tips for fans: wrap up and bring food! - Niall Horan

All happiness depends on a leisurely breakfast. - John Gunther

Synonym Bun: What a thesaurus eats for breakfast - Unknown

A woman is as old as she looks before breakfast. - Edgar W Howe

Hope is a good breakfast, but it is a bad supper. - Francis Bacon

You don't need a silver fork to eat good food. - Paul Prudhomme

Chocolate is more than a food, but less than a drug. - R J Huxtable

Laughter is brightest in the place where the food is. - Irish Proverb

Bacon bits are like fairy dust of the food community. - Unknown

The food in Yugoslavia is fine if you like pork tartare. - Ed Begley Jr.

I love super crispy, almost burned, snapping-crispy bacon. - David Lynch

I often take exercise. Only yesterday I had breakfast in bed. - Oscar Wilde

Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince, and dinner like a pauper. - Adelle Davis

I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick - not wounded - dead. - Woody Allen

Peppering your relationship with a dash of mystery can make it far more palatable. - Khang K. Nguyen

Marketers need to build digital relationships and reputation before closing a sale. - Chris Brogan

An Englishman teaching an American about food is like the blind leading the one-eyed. - A.J. Liebling

My body is like breakfast, lunch, and dinner. I don't think about it, I just have it. - Arnold Schwarzenegger

Life expectancy would grow by leaps and bounds if green vegetables smelled as good as bacon. - Doug Larson

I like spaghetti bolognese, I like baked beans on toast. I hate French food. I hate fancy food. - Simon Cowell

Chocolate symbolizes, as does no other food, luxury, comfort, sensuality, gratification, and love. - Karl Petzke

Every day, thousands of innocent plants are killed by vegetarians. Help end the violence. Eat bacon. - Unknown

If fat people just gave skinny people more food, we could solve obesity and hunger at the same time. - Ashton Kutcher

Remember that your best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other. - Unknown

A relationship without trust is like a car without gas. You can stay in it all you want, but it won't go anywhere. - Jay Shetty

A burrito is a delicious food item that breaks down all social barriers and leads to temporary spiritual enlightenment. - Lisi Harrison

I like Pirate's Booty. Prunes and olives, too. I love hummus. I can eat that until I die. I tend to eat mostly organic food. - Queen Latifah

It's really hard to maintain a one-on-one relationship if the other person is not going to allow me to be with other people. - Axl Rose

I like a well-roasted rotisserie chicken and eggs cooked various ways like sunny-side up or scrambled. It's comfort food for me. - Joel Robuchion

Doctors are saying that each piece of bacon you eat takes 9 minutes off of your life. Based on that math, I should have died in 1732. - Unknown

Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship.
She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays. - Red Skelton

One of my biggest fears is that I'm going to die alone in my home, and my cats will eat me because I am too dead to open their food cans. - Kelli Jae Baeli

Winter is the time for comfort, for good food and warmth, for the touch of a friendly hand and for a talk beside the fire: it is the time for home. - Edith Sitwell

You don't develop courage by being happy in your relationships everyday. You develop it by surviving difficult times and challenging adversity. - Epicurus

Forgiveness is the best form of love in any relationship. It takes a strong person to say they're sorry, and an even stronger person to forgive. - Yolanda Hadid


Mow Your Lawn

Drinking Alone

being Fearless

Bible Bar

A Good Woman

Tunnel Face

Wheelchair Access

Dog Training for Dummies

Pineapple Slicer

Pole Safety

Singapore SkyPark

Nintendo Guitar

Road Detour

Jerushalom

Hot Seat

LippoPotumus

Sidewalk Malt Melt

Senior's Golf Cart

Throwaway Sport Paper

Blonde Geometry Student

Ping Wrong

Tree House

Skull Violins

Finger Phone