#1 humor site on the 'net

Russian Beach

Nuclear submarine warms up water for Europe swimmers

Russian Beach thanks to Keith Blake

Vladimir Putin's Black Sea beach security for Sochi 2014 Olympics

QuotaBills
I love shark week, all kids swim for free. - Josh Stern

Write injuries in sand, kindness in marble. - French Proverb

If your ship doesn't come in, swim out to it. - Jonathan Winters

If I melt dry ice, can I swim without getting wet? - Steven Wright

The secret of politics? Make a good treaty with Russia. - Otto von Bismarck

When I go to the beach, even the tide won't come in. - Phyllis Diller

This is the place to be - in the land of swimming pools. - David Hockney

One cannot collect all the beautiful shells on the beach. - Anne Morrow Lindbergh

Russia is a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma. - Winston Churchill

We had a very successful trip to Russia. We made it back. - Bob Hope

There is no income tax in Russia. But there's no income. - Will Rogers

No man drowns if he perseveres in praying to God, and can swim. - Russian Proverb

Live in the sunshine
Swim in the sea
Drink the wild air - Ralph Waldo Emerson

She's a skeleton in the sand right now. She comes and she goes. - Annalies Corbin

If women can be railroad workers in Russia, why can't they fly in space? - Valentina Tereshkova

In America you can always find a party. In Russia the party always finds you. - Yakov Smirnoff

I've had a lot of luck. If I didn't I'd be washing bottles in Russia. - Marat Safin

It's only when the tide goes out that you learn who's been swimming naked. - Warren Buffet

It's just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up. - Muhammad Ali

I have often wanted to drown my troubles, but I can't get my wife to go swimming. - Jimmy Carter

My mother is Irish, my father is black and Venezuelan, and me - I'm tan, I guess. - Mariah Carey

If I swim in the ocean, I have a shark thought. Not a bad one, but just a little one. - Tea Leoni

In matters of style, swim with the current. In matters of principle, stand like a rock. - Thomas Jefferson

Many agree that the worst thing that could ever happen is if Russia and China get closer. - Donald Trump

Hard men present hard choices - none more so than Vladimir Putin, the President of Russia. - Hillary Clinton

I think Kazan is Russia's sportiest city after Moscow, leaving all the others far behind. - Marat Safin

Nothing is built on stone; all is built on sand, but we must build as if the sand were stone. - Jorge Luis Borges

When I was a little kid we had a sand box. It was a quicksand box. I was an only child... eventually. - Steven Wright

I took a speed reading course and read "War and Peace" in twenty minutes. It involves Russia. - Woody Allen

Ex-Presidents of the United States get state subsidies. Not so in Russia. You get no government support. - Mikhail Gorbachev

For us in Russia, communism is a dead dog, while, for many people in the West, it is still a living lion. - Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn

It is our art that has an opportunity to leave a footprint in the sand. They don't wrap fish in our work. - Hugh N Jacobsen

I was in the first submarine. Instead of a periscope, they had a kaleidoscope. "We're surrounded." - Steven Wright

Many people are surprised to hear that we have comedians in Russia, but they are there. They are dead, but they are there. - Yakov Smirnoff

A mere 40 years ago, beach volleyball was just beginning. No bureaucrat would have invented it, and that's what freedom is all about. - Newt Gingrich

Clay. It's rain, dead leaves, dust, all my dead ancestors. Stones that have been ground into sand. Mud. The whole cycle of life and death. - Martine Vermeulen

Homosexuality in Russia is a crime and the punishment is seven years in prison, locked up with the other men. There is a three year waiting list. - Yakov Smirnoff

Today was about chasing sun-rays, beach waves, and sunsets. All things beautiful that give you peace are worth chasing. Everything else isn't. - April M. Monterrosa

I'll paddle board, swim in the ocean, roll in the sand, soak up the sun, eat good food, be with friends and family and go fishing with my dad. - Behati Prinsloo

If one morning I walked on top of the water across the Potomac River, the headline that afternoon would read: "President Can't Swim." - Lyndon B. Johnson


Crab Collection

Basketball Car

Apathy Mountain

Ready To Leave

Portable Samurai

CPU Marshmallows

Hokey Pokey Clinic

Brazil Banisters

2020 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars (3)

VW Treehouse

Crocodile Fall

Hoodie Onesy

BUSker

Monsoon TV

Worked For Them

Colon Celery

Hot Tub Cover

Piano Dress

Parking Guide

Apology to Potential Criminals

Before Morning Coffee

Sons Of Arthritis

Challenge Accepted

Subway Camouflage