Sling Signs

Health food makes me sick. - Calvin Trillin

Medicine is the best medicine. - Doctors Anonymous

Maternity Hospital: An heirport - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Logic is the anatomy of thought. - Albert Einstein

One doctor makes work for another. - English Proverb

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. - Erma Bombeck

A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running. - Groucho Marx

Through pain I've learned to comfort suffering men. - Virgil

A doctor whose breath smells has no right to medical opinion. - Martin H. Fischer

Our health is a voyage and every illness is an adventure story. - Margiad Evans

Document: Repeating what your Doctor told you in your own words - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Champagne for my real friends and real pain for my sham friends. - Tom Waits

A smart mother makes often a better diagnosis than a poor doctor. - August Bier

Nobody likes insurance companies, especially health insurance companies. - P.J. O'Rourke

He who makes a beast out of himself gets rid of the pain of being a man. - Dr. Seuss

The best way to reduce the cost of medical care is to reduce the illness. - Arlen Specter

The good-news stories in medicine are early detection, early intervention. - Thomas R Insel

Humor does not diminish the pain - it makes the space around it get bigger. - Allen Klein

A woman doctor is only good for women's problems - like your groinocology - Archie Bunker

To array a man's will against his sickness is the supreme art of medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher

This is a sharp medicine, but it is a physician for all diseases and miseries. - Sir Walter Raleigh

No pain, no palm; no thorns, no throne; no gall, no glory; no cross, no crown. - William Penn

Health is like money - we never have a true idea of its value until we lose it. - Josh Billings

My mother-in-law had a pain beneath her left breast. Turned out to be a trick knee. - Phyllis Diller

A man's health can be judged by which he takes two at a time - pills or stairs. - Joan Welsh

I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places. - Henny Youngman

We go by the major vote, and if the majority are insane, the sane must go to the hospital. - Horace Mann

I wonder why you can always read a Doctor's bill but you can never read his prescription. - Finley Peter Dunne

A man has reached middle age when he is warned to slow down by his doctor instead of the police. - Unknown

Mental pain is less dramatic than physical pain, but it is more common and also more hard to bear. - C S Lewis

Finish last in your league and they call you idiot. Finish last in medical school and they call you doctor. - Abe Lemons

Meaninglessness does not come from being weary of pain; meaninglessness comes from being weary of pleasure. - G K Chesterton

Give a man health and a course to steer, and he'll never stop to trouble about whether he's happy or not. - George Bernard Shaw

Despite all our toil and progress, the art of medicine still falls somewhere between trout casting and spook writing. - Ben Hecht

The best doctor in the world is a veterinarian. He can't ask his patients what is the matter - he's got to know. - Will Rogers

I'm planning to adopt a dog soon. It wasn't my first choice but my Doctor told me I can't have any biologically. - Bill Murray

So often the difference from where we are, and where God wants us to be, is the pain we aren't wiling to endure to get there. - Craig Groeschel

I pray for forgiveness. For help and guidance. To be a better person. For the health of my family. For the world to be a better place. - Tyson Fury

Mysterious love, uncertain treasure, hast thou more of pain or pleasure! Endless torments dwell about thee: Yet who would live, and live without thee! - Joseph Addison

In other industries, value is defined by the ultimate stakeholder - the one who benefits, or not, from the service. We should do the same in medicine. - Dave deBronkart