#1 humor site on the 'net

Slow Lent

Bilingual signs along the Banff to Lake Louise highway

Slow Lent thanks to joe-kster

It was a slow Easter for those on the road crew

QuotaBills
Slow and steady wins the race. - Aesop

Humor is a universal language. - Joel Goodman

An old man in a house is a good sign. - Benjamin Franklin

Language is a virus from outer space. - William S Burroughs

A riot is the language of the unheard. - Martin Luther King, Jr.

The eyes have one language everywhere. - George Herbert

And isn't he as slow as a wet week! - Unknown

Wisely, and slow. They stumble that run fast. - William Shakespeare

I am a slow walker, but I never walk backwards. - Abraham Lincoln

Be slow in choosing a friend, slower in changing. - Benjamin Franklin

To climb steep hills requires a slow pace at first. - William Shakespeare

God writes comedy but sometimes has a slow audience. - Garrison Keillor

Life is a foreign language; all men mispronounce it. - Christopher Morley

Death is nature's way of telling you to slow down. - Unknown

The art of communication is the language of leadership. - James Humes

A chip on the shoulder is a sure sign of wood higher up. - Brigham Young

How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow road sign? - George Carlin

A slow miracle is no easier to perform than an instant one. - C S Lewis

We need a president who's fluent in at least one language. - Buck Henry

Drive slow and enjoy the scenery. Drive fast and join the scenery. - Douglas Horton

Changes in language often reflect the changing values of a culture. - Ravi Zacharias

If you're a good numbers person, you're a bad language person. - Frank Luntz

A great many people think that polysyllables are a sign of intelligence. - Barbara Walters

Dreams say what they mean, but they don't say it in daytime language. - Gail Godwin

Symptoms are the body's mother tongue; signs are in a foreign language. - John Brown

A sign of celebrity is that his name is often worth more than his services. - Daniel J. Boorstin

It is often a sign of wit not to show it, and not to see that others want it. - Suzanne Necker

Wishing to be friends is quick work, but friendship is a slow ripening fruit. - Aristotle

I got something important here to read and sign and I gotta consecrate on that. - Archie Bunker

No one has a finer command of language than the person who keeps his mouth shut. - Sam Rayburn

Three problems we have: lack of boundaries, insufficient language, incompletions. - Thomas Leonard

The most beautiful words in the English language are "cheque enclosed". - Dorothy Parker

I personally think we developed language because of our deep inner need to complain. - Jane Wagner

When a man falls into his anecdotage, it is a sign for him to retire from the world. - Benjamin Disraeli

Contradiction is not a sign of falsity, nor the lack of contradiction a sign of truth. - Blaise Pascal

I'm having difficulty getting the doctors around here to sign the appropriate form. - Spike Milligan

Everybody laughs the same in every language because laughter is a universal connection. - Yakov Smirnoff

We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress. - Will Rogers

The first man to use abusive language instead of his fists was the founder of civilization. - Sigmund Freud

I think those neighborhood signs that say 'slow children playing' are so very mean. - Zach Galifianakis

Tears shed for self are tears of weakness, but tears shed for others are a sign of strength. - Billy Graham

No matter how old a mother is, she watches her middle-aged children for signs of improvement. - Florida Scott-Maxwell

It's a strange world of language in which skating on thin ice can get you into hot water. - Franklin P. Jones

If a cluttered desk is the sign of a cluttered mind, what is the significance of a clean desk? - Laurence J. Peter

In a marathon, if you run too fast, you get exhausted. If you run too slow, you never make it. - Uday Kotak

A man has reached middle age when he is warned to slow down by his doctor instead of the police. - Unknown

The sign of intelligent people is their ability to control emotions by the application of reason. - Marya Mannes

German is the most extravagantly ugly language - it sounds like someone using a sick bag on a 747. - Willy Rushton

If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank. - Woody Allen

If the sign on your heart says, "WELCOME", the love will come pouring in from everywhere. - Susan Jeffers

Music is the language of the spirit. It opens the secret of life bringing peace, abolishing strife. - Kahlil Gibran

I saw a sign: "Rest Area 25 Miles". That's pretty big. Some people must be really tired. - Steven Wright

Do not attack me with your watch. A watch is always too fast or too slow. I cannot be dictated to by a watch. - Jane Austen

If you're not failing every now and again, it's a sign you're not doing anything very innovative. - Woody Allen

It's a sign of age if you feel like the morning after the night before and you haven't been anywhere. - Unknown

They say everybody gets 15 minutes. I hope I'm just inside the first minute and the next 14 go really slow. - Terrence Howard

Violence of language leads to violence of action. Angry men seldom fight if their tongues do not lead the fray. - Charles V Roman

The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us. - Bill Watterson

She wore far too much rouge last night and not quite enough clothes. That is always a sign of despair in a woman. - Oscar Wilde

Pain is a sign that we are alive. Problems are a sign that we are strong. Prayer is a sign that we are not alone. - Unknown

Who is apt, on occasion, to assign a multitude of reasons when one will do? This is a sure sign of weakness in argument. - Harriet Martineau

I have Dementia
My responses may be slow.
Take your time and wait for me,
It means more than you can know! - Unknown

Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow internet service to see who they really are. - Will Ferrell

The greatest sign of success for a teacher is to be able to say, "The children are now working as if I did not exist." - Maria Montessori

One of the signs of passing youth is the birth of a sense of fellowship with other human beings as we take our place among them. - Virginia Woolf

If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his language, that goes to his heart. - Nelson Mandela

A man’s life is interesting primarily when he has failed – I well know. For it’s a sign that he tried to surpass himself. - Georges Clemenceau

Abundance and vigor of automatic movements are desirable, and even a considerable degree of restlessness is a good sign in young children. - G Stanley Hall

Music is a language that doesn't speak in particular words. It speaks in emotions, and if it's in the bones, it's in the bones. - Keith Richards

Mathematicians are like Frenchmen: whatever you say to them they translate into their own language and forthwith it is something entirely different. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe


Halloween Coffee

Halloween Cyclist

Florida Halloween

Halloween Beer Dispenser

Pupkin Carving

Spooky Halloween House

Halloween Clouds

Eye Do

Halloween Pit Bull

Halloween Birth

Broom Size

Hobbit Halloween

Halloween Pie

Just Two Buddies Hanging Out

Jewbacca

Colour Wheel

Halloween Driver Costume

Book Cover Pumpkin

Cabin Illusion

Here Comes Baby

The Official Flag of 2020

Redneck DoorBells

Prison Olympics - Razor Wire High Jumping

Afghan Livestock Management