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Someone Stole A Cracker

Going crackers on the kitchen table

Someone Stole A Cracker thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

Who, me?

QuotaBills
Health food makes me sick. - Calvin Trillin

The early worm gets caught. - John Igo

Fine words do not produce food. - Nigeria Proverb

The French: Germans with good food. - Fran Lebowitz

An art thief is a man who takes pictures. - George Carlin

Steal the hog, and give the feet for alms. - George Herbert

What poison is to food, self-pity is to life. - Oliver C. Wilson

Queuing tips for fans: wrap up and bring food! - Niall Horan

We steal if we touch tomorrow. It is God's. - Henry Ward Beecher

She caught a touch of laryngosis from the smoke. - Archie Bunker

I want my food dead. Not sick, not dying - dead. - Oscar Wilde

Thou shalt not steal - only from other comedians. - WC Fields

Housekeeping is like being caught in a revolving door. - Marcelene Cox

Before eating, always take a little time to thank the food. - Arapaho Proverb

Mouse: An animal which strews its path with fainting women. - Ambrose Bierce

That picture with Lon Chaney - "Of Mouse And Men." - Archie Bunker

It's a catch he would have caught 99 times out of 1,000. - Henry Blofeld

I got food poisoning today. I don't know when I'll use it. - Steven Wright

A man is not honest simply because he never had a chance to steal. - Russian Proverb

I'm a bit of a gourmet chef. I love cooking - mostly Thai food. - Will Ferrell

I won't be impressed with technology until I can download food. - Unknown

The maxim that the "best is the cheapest" does not apply to food. - W.O. Atwater

To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research. - Steven Wright

It doesn't matter if a cat is black or white, so long as it catches mice. - Deng Xiaoping

What else is there to live for? Chinese food and women. There is nothing else! - Dudley Moore

Let's commit the perfect crime. I'll steal your heart, and you steal mine. - Meryl Streep

It is better to be a mouse in a cat's mouth than a man in a lawyer's hands. - Spanish Proverb

I went fishing with Rod Ewert. He was using a dotted line. He caught every other fish. - Steven Wright

If more of us cared about food and home above gold, this world would be a merrier place. - Bilbo Baggins

So long as you have food in your mouth, you have solved all questions for the time being. - Franz Kafka

Those who corrupt the public mind are just as evil as those who steal from the public purse. - Adlai E Stevenson

The highlight of my childhood was making my brother laugh so hard that food came out of his nose. - Garrison Keillor

The automatic stabilizer is unemployment insurance, food stamps, additional coverage of Medicaid. - Franklin Raines

Chocolate symbolizes, as does no other food, luxury, comfort, sensuality, gratification, and love. - Karl Petzke

I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness. - Emo Philips

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat. - Alex Levine

Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. The fearful are caught as often as the bold. - Helen Keller

Sea spaghetti looks like dark fettuccine and has a similar texture - you can get it in health food stores or online. - Yotam Ottolenghi

Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water. - WC Fields

Winter is the time for comfort, for good food and warmth, for the touch of a friendly hand and for a talk beside the fire: it is the time for home. - Edith Sitwell


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