Typewriting While Driving

We cannot escape history. - Abraham Lincoln

Never insult anyone by accident. - Robert A. Heinlein

Greyhound Trainer: A race cur driver - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Name the greatest of all inventors. Accident. - Mark Twain

Didn't he take the exercise tax off cars? - Archie Bunker

Live out of your imagination, not your history. - Stephen Covey

Stardom isn't a profession, it's an accident. - Lauren Bacall

We learn from history that we do not learn from history. - Georg W F Hegel

Giving never happens by accident. It's always intentional. - Amy Grant

The history of Scotland is one of theology tempered by homicide. - Ivor Brown

The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it. - Dudley Moore

Women with pasts interest men. They hope history will repeat itself. - Mae West

To attract men, I wear a perfume called "New Car Interior". - Rita Rudner

People can have the Model T in any color - so long as it's black. - Henry Ford

It takes an endless amount of history to make even a little tradition. - Henry James

The very ink with which all history is written is merely fluid prejudice. - Mark Twain

You ain't going nowhere, son. You ought to go back to driving a truck. - Jim Denny

A careful driver is one who honks his horn when he goes through a red light. - Henry Morgan

A private railroad car is not an acquired taste. One takes to it immediately. - Eleanor R. Belmont

The drivers have one foot on the brake, one on the clutch, and one on the throttle. - Bob Varsha

Wealthy people miss one of life's greatest thrills: making the last car payment. - Unknown

Sometimes when you look in his eyes you get the feeling that someone else is driving. - David Letterman

I have to tell them that last night was a shameful train wreck filled with blind cuddly puppies. - Charlie Sheen

The lead car is absolutely, truly unique, except for the one behind it which is exactly identical. - Murray Walker

One of the lessons of history is that nothing is often a good thing to do and always a clever thing to say. - Will Durant

Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pick-up truck, and end up with a station wagon. - Tim Allen

Do you think you're safe in a car with your seatbelt on? Dream on. My friend thought so. Now she's pregnant. - Anke Engelke

I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone. - Steven Wright

A relationship without trust is like a car without gas. You can stay in it all you want, but it won't go anywhere. - Jay Shetty

I do get scared of the dentist, so a drive-through dentist might make me feel more at home. If I got to stay in my car. - Jessica Pare

My whole body is a wreck. I've injured myself so many times with jujitsu, skateboarding, football. I guess I like to live hard. - Scott Caan

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did, in his sleep. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car. - Unknown

I have an answering machine in my car. It says, "I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out." - Steven Wright

A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila. - Mitch Ratcliffe

He's ... probably the greatest corporate leader in the history of a major company... Somebody like that would be absolutely incredible. - Donald Trump

There is only one history of any importance, and it is the history of what you once believed in, and the history of what you came to believe in. - Kay Boyle

A man finds room in the few square inches of the face for the traits of all his ancestors; for the expression of all his history, and his wants. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

History will see advertising as one of the real evil things of our time. It is stimulating people constantly to want things, want this, want that. - Malcolm Muggeridge

Peaceful transfer of authority is rare in history, yet common in our country with a simple oath, we affirm old traditions, and make new beginnings. - George W. Bush

The simple act of opening a bottle of wine has brought more happiness to the human race than all the collective governments in the history of earth. - Jim Harrison