#1 humor site on the 'net

United Procrastinators

Signs of an almost-well-disciplined organization

United Procrastinators thanks to Howard Chapman

We'll get it done... eventually

QuotaBills
Light tomorrow with today. - Elizabeth Barrett Browning

Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow. - Steven Wright

Rabbit: Hare today, mink tomorrow - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

After all, tomorrow is another day! - Gone with the Wind

And in today already walks tomorrow. - Samuel Taylor Coleridge

Tomorrow do thy worst, I have lived today. - John Dryden

The crisis of today is the joke of tomorrow. - H G Wells

To plant a garden is to believe in tomorrow. - Audrey Hepburn

Fools look to tomorrow; wise men use tonight. - Scottish Proverb

Tomorrow is only found in the calendar of fools. - Og Mandino

No date on the calendar is as important as tomorrow. - Roy W Howard

The choice you make today will usually affect tomorrow. - Unknown

Today was good. Today was fun. Tomorrow is another one. - Dr. Seuss

It is thrifty to prepare today for the wants of tomorrow. - Aesop

I never put off till tomorrow what I can do the day after. - Oscar Wilde

The world of the future is in our making. Tomorrow is now. - Eleanor Roosevelt

The best preparation for tomorrow is doing your best today. - H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday. - Dale Carnegie

Worry is today's mice nibbling on tomorrow's cheese. - Unknown

One of the greatest labor-saving inventions of today is tomorrow. - Vincent T. Foss

The cross comes before the crown, and tomorrow is a Monday morning. - C S Lewis

The best preparation for good work tomorrow is to do good work today. - Elbert Hubbard

I will never put off until tomorrow, what I can forget about forever. - Unknown

This is the best day the world has ever seen. Tomorrow will be better. - R.A. Campbell

Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow, it only saps today of its joy. - Leo Buscaglia

Yesterday is ashes; tomorrow wood. Only today does the fire burn brightly. - Eskimo Proverb

Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever. - Mahatma Gandhi

Learn from yesterday, live for today, look to tomorrow, rest this afternoon. - Charles M. Schulz

If we lived for tomorrow will always be just a day away from being realized. - Leo Buscaglia

Here you leave today and enter the world of yesterday, tomorrow, and fantasy. - Walt Disney

The world can't end today, because it's already tomorrow in Australia. - Charles M. Schulz

When you accept who you are today, you can create who you want to be tomorrow. - Unknown

He who was honoured yesterday, and stops practicing today, will lose tomorrow. - Unknown

Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrows, it empties today of its strength. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow has not yet come. We have only today. Let us begin. - Mother Teresa

We are so scared of being judged that we look for every excuse to procrastinate. - Erica Jong

One should really use the camera as though tomorrow you'd be stricken blind. - Dorothea Lange

You can't have a better tomorrow if you are thinking about yesterday all the time. - Charles F. Kettering

We worry about what a child will become tomorrow, yet we forget that he is someone today. - Stacia Tauscher

Yesterday is a cancelled check. Today is cash on the line. Tomorrow is a promissory note. - Hank Stram

Yesterday is a canceled check; tomorrow is a promissory note; today is ready cash - use it. - Kay Lyons

Even if I knew that tomorrow the world would go to pieces, I would still plant my apple tree. - Martin Luther

Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It's already tomorrow in Australia. - Charles M. Schulz

The best compliment we can pay our past is to prophetically and bravely face today and tomorrow. - Bernie Wiebe

No idleness, no laziness, no procrastination: never put off until tomorrow what you can do today. - Lord Chesterfield

You don't know what is going to happen tomorrow. Life is a crazy ride, and nothing is guaranteed. - Eminem

If you're going to do something tonight that you'll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late. - Henny Youngman

You have a cough? Go home tonight, eat a whole box of Ex-Lax - tomorrow you'll be afraid to cough. - Pearl Williams

Never do today what you can do tomorrow. Something may occur to make you regret your premature action. - Aaron Burr

Take thought for the tomorrow, yes, careful thought and planning and preparation. But have no anxiety. - Dale Carnegie

If you're willing to do today what others won't, you can perform tomorrow like others can't. - Jim Brogan

Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow. The important thing is not to stop questioning. - Albert Einstein

I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road and not be questioned about their motives. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

My mother always told me I wouldn't amount to anything because I procrastinate. I said, Just wait. - Judy Tenuta

An economist is an expert who will know tomorrow why the things he predicted yesterday didn't happen today. - Laurence J Peter

Thank you to all who posted kind birthday wishes. I'm touched. The rest of you will be un-friended tomorrow. - Unknown

I went to the bank and reviewed my savings. I found out I have all the money I'll ever need if I die tomorrow. - Henny Youngman

If you do the things today that others won't do, you will have the things tomorrow that others won't have. - Les Brown

Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. - Matthew 6:34

Yesterday is a cancelled check; tomorrow is a promissory note; today is the only cash you have - so spend it wisely. - Unknown

Albert Schweitzer's philosophy is that a sick, miserable African of today can be a strong healthy cannibal tomorrow. - Joe E Lewis

I've learned that no matter what happens, or how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow. - Maya Angelou

Freedom is a personal and lonely battle; and one faces down the fears of today so that those of tomorrow might be engaged. - Alice Walker

Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, I will try again tomorrow. - Mary A Radmacher

Every pessimist who ever lived has been buried in an unmarked grave. Tomorrow has always been better than today, and it always will be. - Paul Harvey

Drink and dance and laugh and lie,
Love, the reeling midnight through,
For tomorrow we shall die!
(But, alas, we never do.) - Dorothy Parker

Fantasy has a dark side to it. It also has a light hemisphere - the power of the human imagination to keep going, to imagine a better tomorrow. - Tim O'Brien

Today is yesterday's victory, yesterday is tomorrow's conquest, and tomorrow is today's war. Though I face death, I am not fearsome. - Nad├Ęge Richards

I am not afraid of tomorrow for I have seen yesterday, I have today and I know Him who holds tomorrow so I know tomorrow will be beautiful for me. - Jaachynma N.E. Agu

Things always get better. Tomorrow will always be better. Just think about it... is there any time in history in which you'd rather live than now? - Paul Harvey


Halloween Coffee

Halloween Cyclist

Florida Halloween

Halloween Beer Dispenser

Pupkin Carving

Spooky Halloween House

Halloween Clouds

Eye Do

Halloween Pit Bull

Halloween Birth

Broom Size

Hobbit Halloween

Halloween Pie

Just Two Buddies Hanging Out

Jewbacca

Colour Wheel

Halloween Driver Costume

Book Cover Pumpkin

Cabin Illusion

Here Comes Baby

The Official Flag of 2020

Redneck DoorBells

Prison Olympics - Razor Wire High Jumping

Afghan Livestock Management