Useful Apple Computer

The computer is a moron. - Peter F Drucker

Payday came and with it beer. - Rudyard Kipling

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. - Unknown

You can never buy beer, you just rent it. - Archie Bunker

You can't write poetry on the computer. - Quentin Tarantino

Beer. Now there's a temporary solution. - Homer Simpson

The writer is the engineer of the human soul. - Joseph Stalin

Beer: The method of turning grain into urine. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world. - Jack Nicholson

Computer logic is no substitute for human wisdom. - Unknown

Man is still the most extraordinary computer of all. - John F Kennedy

Hardware: the parts of a computer that can be kicked. - Jeff Pesis

The computer is down. I hope it's something serious. - Stanton Delaplane

Ah, beer, my one weakness. My Achilles heel, if you will. - Homer Simpson

Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Wilhelm II

There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home. - Ken Olson

I never drank anything stronger than beer before I was twelve. - WC Fields

A meal of bread, cheese, and beer constitutes the perfect food. - Queen Elizabeth I

To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer. - Paul Ehrlich

Give me a woman who truly loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Kaiser Willhelm II

In heaven there is no beer...
That's why we drink ours here. - Unknown

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing. - Emo Philips

Please leave my computer alone. The only cookies I want to get are the ones I can eat. - Heather Wolf

Keyboard: 1. Place to hang your keys; 2. The standard way to generate computer errors. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx

They don't make pizza or beer out of celery. And that is all you need to know about celery. - Bill Murray

An Irishman after trying American beer for the first time: "Put it back in the horse!" - Unknown

Learning by doing, peer-to-peer teaching, and computer simulation are all part of the same equation. - Nicholas Negroponte

You go to your TV to turn your brain off. You go to the computer when you want to turn your brain on. - Steve Jobs

I use a computer. I don't know if that qualifies me as a techie, but I'm pretty good on the computer. - Leonard Nimoy

They've finally come up with the perfect office computer. If it makes a mistake, it blames another computer. - Milton Berle

Man is the cheapest 150-pound nonlinear, all-purpose computer system which can be mass-produced by unskilled labor. - NASA

If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 2,000 MPG. - Bill Gates

The protean nature of the computer is such that it can act like a machine or like a language to be shaped and exploited. - Alan Kay

Just think how far we've come in the 20th Century. The man who used to be a cog in the wheel is now a digit in the computer. - Robert Fuoss

A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila. - Mitch Ratcliffe

When a train goes through a tunnel and it gets dark, you don't throw away the ticket and jump off. You sit still and trust the engineer. - Corrie Ten Boom

NASA's robot Curiosity landed on Mars. Early pictures show no signs of ESPN or beer. This makes it very clear that men are not from Mars. - Unknown

Making duplicate copies and computer printouts of things no one wanted even one of in the first place is giving America a new sense of purpose. - Andy Rooney

To the optimist, the glass is half-full. To the pessimist, the glass is half-empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be. - Unknown