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Why Santa Was A Little Late This Year

Rudolph didn't want to lead the sleigh last night

Why Santa Was A Little Late This Year thanks to Keith Blake

Rounding up the reindeer was pain-full

QuotaBills
Santa's Guh-nomes - Archie Bunker

A wounded deer leaps the highest. - Emily Dickinson

He who has no falcon must hunt with an owl. - Danish Proverb

Christmas comes, but once a year is enough. - American Proverb

Don't think to hunt two hares with one dog. - Benjamin Franklin

Hunting: the least honorable form of war on the weak. - Paul Richard

I get really grinchy right up until Christmas morning. - Dan Aykroyd

The ornament of a house is the friends who frequent it. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Halloween starts earlier and earlier, just like Christmas. - Robert Englund

Fox hunting is the unspeakable in pursuit of the inedible. - Oscar Wilde

Modesty is not only an ornament, but also a guard to virtue. - Joseph Addison

I'm going to the North Pole to help out Santa this year. - Jimmy Fallon

The perils of duck hunting are great - especially for the duck. - Walter Cronkite

Vegetarian: an old Indian word for "doesn't hunt well." - Paul Harvey

If the hunter comes back with mushrooms, don't ask him how his hunt was. - Ghanaian Proverb

Mail your packages early, so the Post Office can lose them in time for Christmas. - Johnny Carson

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live. - George Carlin

I'm a Catholic deer hunter. I am happy to be clinging to my guns and my religion. - Paul Ryan

Though so trifling, the success of our first Buffalo hunt gave us quite a social lift. - Ernest T. Seton

An army of deer led by a lion is more to be feared than an army of lions led by a deer. - Philip II

I built my church on Easter services, Christmas Eve services, and Norman Vincent Peale. - Robert H. Schuller

In my cosmology, indigenous wild deer are more important than exotic ornamental shrubs. - Elizabeth M. Thomas

True and solemn meaning of Christmas, which is a time for peace and quiet contemptation. - Archie Bunker

Learning is an ornament in prosperity, a refuge in adversity, and a provision in old age. - Aristotle

If 'ifs and buts' were 'candy and nuts', we'd have Christmas every day. - Unknown

The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing. - Steven Wright

I'm glad I don't have to hunt for my food. I don't even know where Sandwiches live. - Bill Murray

My tastes are not those of the king, who has none, except for hunting and mechanic's labour. - Marie Antoinette

The fabled musk deer searches the world over for the source of the scent which comes from itself. - Ramakrishna

I still have my Christmas Tree. I looked at it today. Sure enough, I couldn't see any forests. - Steven Wright

The Christmas season has come to mean the period when the public plays Santa Claus to the merchants. - John Andrew Holmes

A moose is an animal with horns on the front of its head and a hunting lodge wall on the back of it. - Groucho Marx

Might make a real good Christmas present for the uninformed. The book is called 'Taking America Back.' - Paul Harvey

I gave my young nephew a book for Christmas. He's spent six months looking for where to put the batteries. - Milton Berle

A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together. - Garrison Keillor

I am getting to an age when I can only enjoy the last sport left. It is called 'hunting for your spectacles.' - Edward Grey

Did you read about Starbucks? No more "Merry Christmas" at Starbucks. No more. Maybe we should boycott Starbucks. - Donald Trump

When you hunt animals, you may succeed or not. But when you open the fridge, you will succeed a hundred percent of the time. - Nora Volkow

Wise sayings are not only for ornament, but for action and business, having a point or edge, whereby knots in business are pierced and discovered. - Francis Bacon

There is no hunting like the hunting of man, and those who have hunted armed men long enough and liked it, never care for anything else thereafter. - Ernest Hemingway


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