Why We're Always Out of TP

You gotta be kitten me. - Unknown

All cats appear grey in the dark. - English Proverb

Dogs have masters. Cats have staff. - Unknown

Meow means "woof" in cat. - George Carlin

When the cat's away, the mice will play. - French Proverb

A cat bitten once by a snake dreads even rope. - Arab Proverb

A cat is a puzzle for which there is no solution. - Hazel Nicholson

Going to law is losing a cow for the sake of a cat. - Mark Twain

The kind man feeds his cat before sitting down to dinner. - Hebrew Proverb

Endangered forests are being slaughtered for toilet paper. - Daphne Zuniga

Women's clothes: never wear anything that panics the cat. - P.J. O'Rourke

People that hate cats will come back as mice in their next life. - Faith Resnick

The Cat. He walked by himself, and all places were alike to him. - Rudyard Kipling

If the cat sits long enough at the hole, it will catch the mouse. - Irish proverb

A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats. - Benjamin Franklin

A lame cat is better than a swift horse when rats infest the palace. - Chinese Proverb

It was a great interview process. They were fighting like cats and dogs. - Donald Trump

The trouble with a kitten is that when it grows up, it's always a cat. - Ogden Nash

A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere. - Groucho Marx

It doesn't matter if a cat is black or white, so long as it catches mice. - Deng Xiaoping

If you hold a cat by the tail you learn things you cannot learn any other way. - Mark Twain

The main difference between a cat and a lie is that a cat only has nine lives. - Mark Twain

Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier'n puttin' it back. - Will Rogers

It is better to be a mouse in a cat's mouth than a man in a lawyer's hands. - Spanish Proverb

Sleep is like my cat. I can call him by his name, but he still won't come to me. - Shane Koyczan

I love cats because I enjoy my home, and little by little they become its visible soul. - Jean Cocteau

France is a country where the money falls apart but you can't tear the toilet paper. - Billy Wilder

Without my Vulcan cat suit, Frankenstein wig and pointed ears, I don't get recognized. - Jolene Blalock

I have studied many philosophers and many cats. The wisdom of cats is infinitely superior. - Hippolyte Taine

Always the cat remains a little beyond the limits we try to set for him in our blind folly. - Andre Norton

One of the most striking differences between a cat and a lie is that a cat has only nine lives. - Mark Twain

Castro couldn't even go to the bathroom unless the Soviet Union put the nickel in the toilet. - Richard M Nixon

When I play with my cat, who knows whether she is not amusing herself with me more than I with her. - Montaigne

If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: pour a little Lavoris in the toilet. - Jay Leno

When witches go riding and black cats are seen,
The moon laughs and whispers, 'tis near Halloween. - Unknown

I will be deafer than the blue-eyed cat, And thrice as blind as any noonday owl, To holy virgins in their ecstasies. - Alfred Tennyson

A tom cat hijacked a plane, stuck a pistol into the pilot's ribs and demanded, "Take me to the Canaries." - Bob Monkhouse

I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. - Steven Wright

Men who consistently leave the toilet seat up secretly want women to get up to go the bathroom in the middle of the night and fall in. - Rita Rudner

One of my biggest fears is that I'm going to die alone in my home, and my cats will eat me because I am too dead to open their food cans. - Kelli Jae Baeli