#1 humor site on the 'net

Adaptive Roots

Root-bound tree searches for camouflage path

Adaptive Roots thanks to Wayne Nowazek

Survival in the concrete jungle

QuotaBills
Weeping Willow: Sad tree - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Ancestry is a hereditary condition. - Unknown

People like to trace their ancestry. - Richard Dawkins

The root of suffering is attachment. - Buddha

A little axe can cut down a big tree. - Jamaican Saying

A root is a flower that disdains fame. - Kahlil Gibran

The apple will fall under the apple tree. - Greek Proverb

Deep in their roots, all flowers keep the light. - Theodore Roethke

When you think about a walking tree, laughter is the response. - John Rhys-Davies

I ordered a bed from IKEA and they sent me a tree trunk and a saw. - Eileen Curtright

Zealotry: 1. The enemy of idealism; 2. What a tree salesman likes to do. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now. - Chinese Proverb

Far from idleness being the root of all evil, it is rather the only true good. - Soren Kierkegaard

The fairest thing in nature, a flower, still has its roots in earth and manure. - D H Lawrence

Each has his own tree of ancestors, but at the top of all sits Probably Arboreal. - Robert Louis Stevenson

Southerners are so devoted to genealogy that we see a family tree under every bush. - Florence King

If my Valentine you won't be,
I'll hang myself on your Christmas tree. - Ernest Hemingway

If I had six hours to chop down a tree, I'd spend the first four hours sharpening the axe. - Abraham Lincoln

The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants. - Thomas Jefferson

Character is better than ancestry, and personal conduct is of more importance than the highest. - Thomas J. Barnardo

I still have my Christmas Tree. I looked at it today. Sure enough, I couldn't see any forests. - Steven Wright

Why pay money to have your family tree traced; go into politics and your opponents will do it for you. - Unknown

If you plant yourself in one place and let your roots grow deep, there is no limit to what God can do. - Mark Batterson

The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a family all wrapped up in each other. - Bill Vaughan

Bountiful: What Captain Bligh declared after learning that one more breadfruit tree would sink his ship - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The reason there are so many tree-lined boulevards in Paris is so the German army can march in the shade. - George S Patton

Our ideas, like orange-plants, spread out in proportion to the size of the box which imprisons the roots. - Edward Bulwer Lytton

The man who has nothing to boast of but his illustrious ancestry is like the potato - the best part under ground. - Thomas Overbury

Lord save us all from old age and broken health and a hope tree that has lost the faculty of putting out blossoms. - Mark Twain

The words 'figure' and 'fictitious' both derive from the same Latin root, 'fingere.' Beware! - M.J. Moroney

Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. - Abraham Lincoln

If art is to nourish the roots of our culture, society must set the artist free to follow his vision wherever it takes him. - John F Kennedy

Only when the last tree has withered, and the last fish caught, and the last river been poisoned, will we realize we cannot eat money. - Cree Proverb

Don't over-analyze your marriage; it's like yanking up a fragile indoor plant every 20 minutes to see how its roots are growing. - Ogden Nash

Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it was stupid. - Albert Einstein

The axe cannot boast of the tree it has cut down. It could do nothing but for the woodsman. He made it, he sharpened it, and he used it. - Samuel Brengel

The greatest thing about man is his ability to transcend himself, his ancestry and his environment and to become what he dreams of being. - Tully C. Knoles

Some national parks have long waiting lists for camping reservations. When you have to wait a year to sleep next to a tree, something is wrong. - George Carlin

Advice from a tree:
- Stand tall and proud
- Go out on a limb
- Remember your roots
- Drink plenty of water
- Enjoy the view - Unknown

Love is like the wild-rose briar, friendship like the holly-tree. The holly is dark when the rose-briar blooms, but which will bloom most constantly? - Emily Bronte


Illusive Animal Kingdom

Off The Wall Biker

Buffalo Art

TitanoBoa

Secret Graduation Gift

Fish Fingers

I'll Be Right There

Redneck Sandals

Down Under Statue

Ventriloquist Isolation

Dr. Hedgehog

Flower Frame Heels

PEI Weather

Frankfurt Subway Entrance

Shopping With Your Husband

Where is Waldo?

Costco Beach Towel

Handwritting

July 4th Balloon

Maritime Treat

Redneck Wheelchair Stroller

Reflective Art

Canadian Drive-Thru

Work At Home Mom