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Car Jump

Dude, I'm positive you can make that jump

Car Jump thanks to Keith Blake

When Evel Knievel changed his name to Awful Knawfull

QuotaBills
Go back a little to leap further. - John Clarke

Chop your own path. Get off the car track. - A.Y. Jackson

Put the ladder over before you jump overboard. - Unknown

Care shouldn't start in the emergency room. - James Douglas

Never invest emergency savings in the stock market. - Suze Orman

By trying often, the monkey learns to jump from the tree. - Cameroon Proverb

Auto racing began 5 minutes after the second car was built. - Henry Ford

My barn having burned to the ground, I can now see the moon. - Christina Frederick

This is one small step for a man, one giant leap for mankind. - Neil Armstrong

I don't jog. It makes the ice jump right out of my glass. - David Lee Roth

I had to stop driving my car for a while - the tires got dizzy. - Steven Wright

Coward: One who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his legs. - Ambrose Bierce

I hope it will be hard for the Russians to jump across that creek. - Gustavus Adolphus

Jumping At Conclusions: Not half as much exercise as digging for facts - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who has never owned a car. - Carrie Snow

The harpsichord sounds like two skeletons copulating on a corrugated roof. - Thomas Beecham

Don't be a fish; be a frog. Swim in the water and jump when you hit ground. - Kim Young-ha

When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife. - Prince Philip

Leap year gives me extra time to reflect on how unproductive I am with extra time. - Homer Simpson

The most dangerous thing I've ever done is probably bungee jumping in Thailand. - Simon Cowell

Wealthy people miss one of life's greatest thrills: making the last car payment. - Unknown

If a farmer fills his barn with grain, he gets mice; if he leaves it empty, he gets actors. - Bill Vaughan

The dent in his car is hardly cold and he's coming over here to claim his pound of fish. - Archie Bunker

Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck. - George Carlin

We are our own dragons as well as our own heroes, and we have to rescue ourselves from ourselves. - Tom Robbins

All growth is a leap in the dark, a spontaneous, unpremeditated act without benefit of experience. - Henry Miller

Every leap year I like to jump. It’s a good way to get my daily exercise in every four years. - Jarod Kintz

I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving. - Steven Wright

I'm going to the backseat of my car with the woman I love, and I won't be back for ten minutes. - Homer Simpson

Don't be afraid to take a big step if one is indicated. You can't cross a chasm in two small jumps. - David Lloyd George

I have left orders to be awakened at any time in case of national emergency, even if I'm in a cabinet meeting. - Ronald Reagan

Life's golden age is when the children are too old to need babysitters and too young to borrow the family car. - Unknown

For all of the fights I have had in my life, both on and off the ice, I have only been in the back of a cop car once. - Tie Domi

I have an answering machine in my car. It says, "I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out." - Steven Wright

Living is a form of not being sure, not knowing what next or how. We guess. We may be wrong, but we take leap after leap in the dark. - Agnes de Mille

A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad. - Theodore Roosevelt

My life is the land, the dogs, the car, the motorcycle, the pond, the canoe, going to pick up mail. It's just a rural retreat that I enjoy. - Burt Shavitz

Love is like jumping out of an airplane with no parachute. But there’s no need to be frightened, because that plane is still on the ground. - Jarod Kintz

The best way to meet a woman is in an emergency situation - if you're in a shipwreck, or you find yourself behind enemy lines, or in a flood. - Mark Helprin

When I get real bored, I like to drive downtown and get a great parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask me if I'm leaving. - Steven Wright


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