#1 humor site on the 'net

Closed Stor

How to get notis'd with custom signage

Closed Stor thanks to Dave Loewen

A truly custom business sign

QuotaBills
Liquor Store: A stupor market - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A closed mouth gathers no feet. - American Proverb

An old man in a house is a good sign. - Benjamin Franklin

We can never tell what is in store for us. - Harry S Truman

Last week, I went to Philadelphia, but it was closed. - WC Fields

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory. - Steven Wright

A chip on the shoulder is a sure sign of wood higher up. - Brigham Young

We must interpret a bad temper as a sign of inferiority. - Alfred Adler

How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow road sign? - George Carlin

A woman will buy anything she thinks the store is losing money on. - Kin Hubbard

A great many people think that polysyllables are a sign of intelligence. - Barbara Walters

You can lead a horse to water but I'd rather ride it to the liquor store. - Wayne Nowazek

It is often a sign of wit not to show it, and not to see that others want it. - Suzanne Necker

The fellow that owns his own home is always just coming out of a hardware store. - Kin Hubbard

All things that people take home from the store become part of their identities. - David Masten

If you can do something with your eyes closed, it's time to find something new. - Kathie L Gifford

Contradiction is not a sign of falsity, nor the lack of contradiction a sign of truth. - Blaise Pascal

I'm having difficulty getting the doctors around here to sign the appropriate form. - Spike Milligan

If a cluttered desk is a sign of a cluttered mind, of what, then, is an empty desk a sign? - Albert Einstein

Closed in a room, my imagination becomes the universe, and the rest of the world is missing out. - Criss Jami

The sign of intelligent people is their ability to control emotions by the application of reason. - Marya Mannes

If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank. - Woody Allen

It is when we notice the dirt that God is most present in us; it is the very sign of His presence. - C S Lewis

If the sign on your heart says, "WELCOME", the love will come pouring in from everywhere. - Susan Jeffers

Cease to inquire what the future has in store, and to take as a gift whatever the day brings forth. - Horace

He who can no longer pause to wonder and stand rapt in awe, is as good as dead; his eyes are closed. - Albert Einstein

The Christian's Bible is a drug store. Its contents remain the same, but the medical practice changes. - Mark Twain

It's a sign of age if you feel like the morning after the night before and you haven't been anywhere. - Unknown

Crying doesn't indicate that you are weak. Ever since you were born it's been a sign that you are alive. - Unknown

You can spend your precious energy beating down closed doors, or you can choose the doors that open when you knock. - Unknown

The odds of going to the store for a loaf of bread and coming out with only a loaf of bread are three billion to one. - Erma Bombeck

Who is apt, on occasion, to assign a multitude of reasons when one will do? This is a sure sign of weakness in argument. - Harriet Martineau

Don't be afraid of being scared. To be afraid is a sign of common sense. Only complete idiots are not afraid of anything. - Carlos Ruiz Zafon

The greatest sign of success for a teacher is to be able to say, "The children are now working as if I did not exist." - Maria Montessori

No sign of pleasure greeted the announcement. The mood in the hall was leaden.
My mood was livelier. Fright is livelier than lead. - Gail Carson Levine

A man’s life is interesting primarily when he has failed – I well know. For it’s a sign that he tried to surpass himself. - Georges Clemenceau

Abundance and vigor of automatic movements are desirable, and even a considerable degree of restlessness is a good sign in young children. - G Stanley Hall

Mushroom: 1. A motel for quickies; 2. The place where they store the school food; 3. A room that has no sides, no walls, no doors and no ceilings. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I went to the hardware store and bought some used paint. It was in the shape of a house. I also bought some batteries, but they weren't included. - Steven Wright

When one door of happiness closes, another opens, but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one that has been opened for us. - Helen Keller


Tree Removal

Happy Billionaire Halloween

Almost Done

Halloween Transformers

Latte Defined

Bush Zombie

Clean Windows Are Highly Over-rated

Cutting Off Board

Eat Your Dinner!

Hormone Guide

Gun Laws

Pumpkin-Themed Baby Announcement

Wolfermelon

Car Axident

Centipede Pumpkin

Hiding Horse

How To Enjoy Pumpkin Beer

Bourbon Shampoo

Goat Bike

Food Art

Rednecks At Play

She's A Keeper

Algebra Relationship

Pumpkin Races