#1 humor site on the 'net

Ear Warmers

Essential self-heating garment to keep you warm this winter

Ear Warmers thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

Keeping warm in the Moist West Territories

QuotaBills
Happiness is a warm puppy. - Charles Schulz

They have ears, but cannot hear. - Ravi Zacharias

Get rid of the pointed ears guy. - NBC Executive

Lawsuits: Clothes worn by an attorney - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The silence is so deep it hurts our ears. - Haruki Murakami

Men trust their ears less than their eyes. - Herodotus

You're short on ears and long on mouth. - John Wayne

Give every man thine ear, but few thy voice. - Shakespeare

A gentleman never strikes a lady with his hat on. - Fred Allen

Next time you give your clothes away, stay in them. - Henny Youngman

You cannot reason with a hungry belly; it has no ears. - Greek Proverb

Love is the magician that pulls man out of his own hat. - Ben Hecht

Women's clothes: never wear anything that panics the cat. - P.J. O'Rourke

You ought to get out of those wet clothes and into a dry martini. - Mae West

Men fall in love with their eyes. Women fall in love with their ears. - Dr. Phil McGraw

Death twitches my ear. "Live," he says; "I am coming." - Virgil

College is a place to keep warm between high school and an early marriage. - George Gobel

We have two ears and one tongue so that we would listen more and talk less. - Diogenes

We have two ears and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak. - Epictetus

Fine clothes are good only as they supply the want of other means of procuring respect. - Samuel Johnson

What a blessing it would be if we could open and shut our ears as easily we do our eyes. - Georg C. Lichtenberg

Let choice whisper in your ear and love murmur in your heart. Be ready, here comes life. - Unknown

You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx

Without my Vulcan cat suit, Frankenstein wig and pointed ears, I don't get recognized. - Jolene Blalock

Music brings a warm glow to my vision, thawing mind and muscle from their endless wintering. - Haruki Murakami

One of the few articles of clothing that a man won't try to remove from a woman is an apron. - Marilyn Vos Savant

True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked. - Erich Segal

Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell. - Joan Crawford

Have you ever taken anything out of the clothes basket because it had become, relatively, the cleaner thing? - Katherine Whitehorn

Drag your thoughts away from your troubles... by the ears, by the heels, or any other way you can manage it. - Mark Twain

I wish I could stand on a busy street corner, hat in hand and beg people to throw me all of their wasted hours. - Bernard Berenson

Kissing power is stronger than will power: Girls need to 'prove their love' like a moose needs a hat rack. - Abigail VanBuren

I love Canada. It makes a nice hat for America. When America runs out of water, it's the first place I'll go. - Ryan Reynolds

It is impossible to travel faster than the speed of light, and certainly not desirable, as one's hat keeps blowing off. - Woody Allen

It is the eye of other people that ruin us. If I were blind I would want, neither fine clothes, fine houses or fine furniture. - Benjamin Franklin

A hat should be taken off when you greet a lady, and left off for the rest of your life. Nothing looks more stupid than a hat. - P.J. O'Rourke

On the top of the Crumpetty Tree
The Quangle Wangle sat,
But his face you could not see,
On account of his Beaver Hat. - Edward Lear

It is good for a man to invite his ghosts into his warm interior, out of the wild night, into the firelight, out of the howling dark. - A.S. Byatt

A politician should have three hats. One for throwing into the ring, one for talking through, and one for pulling rabbits out of if elected. - Carl Sandburg

This was a very classy guy - in a sharp coat there, one of them velvet collars, and of of them pearl-gray hamburgers on his head (Homburg hat). - Archie Bunker


Photobombing

Aussie Boat Ride

One Slice

Water Street

Hungry Tree

Dashing Name

Donut Holes

Dog Wash

Piano Dress

Hazards of Nose Picking

Mandela Perspective

I Want It All

Squid Squash

2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Portrait Gallery

Boot Dog

Laundry Done

Rabbit Boost

Coke's Special Ingredients

Nanosecond Moments

Giraffic Park

Wine Karaoke

Other Door

Mistake Variations