#1 humor site on the 'net

Flying is so Overrated

Looking for an easier way to travel across the country

Flying is so Overrated thanks to Keith Blake

Trains are much nicer

QuotaBills
The early bird catches the worm. - English Proverb

Birds of a feather flock together. - English Proverb

The freedom of birds is an insult to me. - Cormac McCarthy

Heavenly bodies are nests of invisible birds. - Dejan Stojanovic

Was there a bird for the souls of people like me? - Ruta Sepetys

The bird a nest, the spider a web, man friendship. - William Blake

Roasted pigeons will not fly into one's mouth. - Dutch Proverb

Intelligence without ambition is a bird without wings. - Salvador Dali

The early bird gets the worm. The early worm gets eaten. - Norman Augustine

I never wanted to weigh more heavily on a man than a bird. - Coco Chanel

If one cannot catch the bird of paradise, better take a wet hen. - Nikita Krushchev

The only thing I’m afraid of is a life without you, Pigeon. - Jamie McGuire

Faith is the bird that feels the light when the dawn is still dark. - Rabindranath Tagore

The bird of paradise alights only upon the hand that does not grasp. - John Berry

Keep a green tree in your heart and perhaps a singing bird will come. - Chinese Proverb

The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese. - Steven Wright

The early bird would never catch the worm if the dumb worm slept late. - Milton Berle

In order to see birds it is necessary to become a part of the silence. - Robert Lynd

The structure of a play is always the story of how the birds come home to roost. - Arthur Miller

The bird, the bee, the running child are all the same to the sliding glass door. - Demetri Martin

I spent a lot of my money on booze, birds and fast cars... the rest I squandered. - George Best

A bird doesn't sing because it has an answer; it sings because it has a song. - Lou Holtz

It's just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up. - Muhammad Ali

Hold fast to dreams, for if dreams die, life is a broken winged bird that cannot fly. - Lanston Hughes

I am no bird; and no net ensnares me; I am a free human being with an independent will. - Charlotte Bronte

My husband, Fang, is so dumb I once said, "There's a dead bird." He looked up. - Phyllis Diller

Be grateful for luck. Pay the thunder no mind. Listen to the birds. And don't hate nobody. - Eubie Blake

Love is not only the story of butterflies or birds; it is also the story of jackals and hounds. - M.F. Moonzajer

A bird that you set free may be caught again, but a word that escapes your lips will not return. - Jewish Proverb

I'd rather learn from one bird how to sing than to teach ten thousand stars how not to dance. - e e cummings

I think we consider too much the good luck of the early bird and not enough the bad luck of the early worm. - Franklin D Roosevelt

Just as the bird sings or the butterfly soars, because it is his natural characteristic, so the artist works. - Alma Gluck

Marriage is like a cage; one sees the birds outside desperate to get in, and those inside desperate to get out. - Ogden Nash

One reason why birds and horses are not unhappy is because they are not trying to impress other birds and horses. - Dale Carnegie

The reason birds can fly and we can't is simply because they have perfect faith, for to have faith is to have wings. - J.M. Barrie

You can't be suspicious of a tree, or accuse a bird or a squirrel of subversion or challenge the ideology of a violet. - Hal Borland

The only difference between a pigeon and the American farmer today is that a pigeon can still make a deposit on a John Deere. - Jim Hightower

You are Mr. Owl. I am Ms. Hummingbird. We may come from different species but as long as you're a bird, I'm a bird too. - Glad Munaiseche

The moment a little boy is concerned with which is a jay and which is a sparrow, he can no longer see the birds or hear them sing. - Eric Berne

If I were a flower,
humming bird would be my favourite bee
And If I were blind,
the light of darkness I'd love to see - Munia Khan


BUSker

Monsoon TV

Worked For Them

Colon Celery

Hot Tub Cover

Piano Dress

Parking Guide

Apology to Potential Criminals

Before Morning Coffee

Sons Of Arthritis

Challenge Accepted

Subway Camouflage

In Stitches

Great White

2020 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars (3)

Can I Lick It

It Was A Dark And Stormy Night

Velociraptor Defined

Redneck Muffler Repair

Drama Queen Diary

He Looks Just Like His Father!

Happy Snow Car

Sand Strap Experience

Redneck Calf Feeder