#1 humor site on the 'net

France-Is Bacon

French cuisine takes on Eiffel Tower image

France-Is Bacon thanks to Keith Blake

Francis Bacon, father of inductive reasoning, would be proud of this

QuotaBills
France is a dog-hole. - William Shakespeare

Tantamount: Riding a French Aunt - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The French: Germans with good food. - Fran Lebowitz

France was a long despotism tempered by epigrams. - Thomas Carlyle

Parasites: What you see from the top of the Eiffel Tower - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Harlez Vous Francais?: Can you drive a French motorcycle? - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

To understand Europe, you have to be a genius - or French. - Madeleine Albright

France has lost the battle, but France has not lost the war. - Charles de Gaulle

My husband is a general's chauffeur somewhere in France. - Lillie Langtry

The best thing I know between France and England is the sea. - Douglas Jerrold

I like the Eiffel Tower in Las Vegas more than the actual one. - David LaChapelle

Boy, those French. They have a different world for everything! - Steve Martin

In France, cooking is a serious art form and a national sport. - Julia Child

As the French used to say, "the peace of resistance." - Archie Bunker

If the French were really intelligent, they'd speak English. - Wilfred Sheed

Mick Jagger could French-kiss a moose. He has child-bearing lips. - Joan Rivers

'Escargot' is French for 'fat crawling bag of phlegm'. - Dave Barry

England is an empire, Germany is a nation, a race, France is a person. - Jules Michelet

There are ways of singing in English that are not just the same as in French. - Coeur de Pirate

The French invented the only known cure for dandruff. It is called the guillotine. - P G Wodehouse

To God I speak Spanish, to women Italian, to men French, and to my horse - German. - Emperor Charles V

France is a country where the money falls apart but you can't tear the toilet paper. - Billy Wilder

If I had an ego as big as the Eiffel Tower, would I have won this many collective trophies? - Zlatan Ibrahimovic

I like spaghetti bolognese, I like baked beans on toast. I hate French food. I hate fancy food. - Simon Cowell

Never doubt the courage of the French. They were the ones who discovered that snails are edible. - Doug Larson

The Kingdom of France will be thus ruled by King Charles VII... He will enter Paris in good company. - Joan of Arc

In France we leave unmolested those who set fire to the house, and persecute those who sound the alarm. - Sebastien Chamfort

I had a meal last night. I ordered everything in French - surprised everybody, it was a Chinese restaurant. - Tommy Cooper

I went to a fancy French restaurant called "Deja Vu." The headwaiter said, "Don't I know you?" - Steven Wright

I went to a restaurant that serves "breakfast at any time". So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance. - Steven Wright

In any world menu, Canada must be considered the vichyssoise of nations - it's cold, half-French, and difficult to stir. - Stuart Keate

The Arc de Triomphe, the Eiffel Tower. They're monumental. They're straight out of Page 52 in your school history book. - Billy Crystal

If I were God and I were trying to create a nation that would get up the nostrils of the Englishman, I would create the French. - Julian Barnes


Finger Phone

Family Bike

Airless See-Through Tires

Aussie Motorcycle

Statue Selfie

Bacon Sandwich

Elephant Hand

Unless Your Dog Can Do This

Dragon Buoy

Cat On A Hot Tin Roof

Bird Melons

Local Crabs

Black Golfer

Ostrich Imprint

Tea Party Weapon

Extra Space Bed

Unattended Children

ThrowYo

Cell Phone Warning

Umbrella Protection and Non-Protection

Husband Creche

Undertaker Bike

Road Sign Dictionary

Sandal Security