#1 humor site on the 'net

Herd Starter Kit

Planting the seeds of inspiration Down Under

Herd Starter Kit thanks to Howard Chapman

A moo-ving idea from the Country Women's Association of New South Wales

Herd Starter Kit thanks to Howard Chapman

Growing herds of cattle ... Cow seeds for Australians - be patient while planting your new herd

QuotaBills
Never kick a cow chip on a hot day. - Will Rogers

Where rage seeds, repentance reaps. - Greek Proverb

Always drink upstream from the herd. - Will Rogers

Vice-President: A cow's fifth teat. - Harry S Truman

Milk the cow but do not pull off the udder. - Greek Proverb

Laughing Stock: Cattle with a sense of humour - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Why buy a cow if you can get the milk for free. - English Proverb

LAN Down Under: Local Area Network in Australia - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

De-caffeinated: What a cow gets when it has a baby - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Going to law is losing a cow for the sake of a cat. - Mark Twain

Men love to wonder, and that is the seed of our science. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The patriot's blood is the seed of Freedom's tree. - Thomas Campbell

Heifer cow is better than none, but this is no time for puns. - Groucho Marx

Don't let the seeds stop you from enjoying the watermelon. - Unknown

Plant the seed of meditation and reap the fruit of peace of mind. - Unknown

The cow is of the bovine ilk;
One end is moo, the other milk. - Ogden Nash

All the good ideas I ever had came to me while I was milking a cow. - Grant Wood

A happy thought is like a seed that sows positivity for all to reap. - Miriam Muhammad

You should never hesitate to trade your cow for a handful of magic beans. - Tom Robbins

Energy, like the Biblical grain of the mustard seed, will remove mountains. - Hosea Ballou

Don't judge each day by the harvest you reap, but by the seeds you plant. - Robert Louis Stevenson

The world can't end today, because it's already tomorrow in Australia. - Charles M. Schulz

I planted some bird seed. A bird came up. Now I don't know what to feed it. - Steven Wright

Life is a slice of watermelon: never without seeds but sweet 'til the bitter end. - Unknown

When New Zealanders emigrate to Australia, it raises the average IQ of both countries. - Robert Muldoon

I never said all actors are cattle; what I said was all actors should be treated like cattle. - Alfred Hitchcock

The fantasy of every Australian man is to have two women - one cleaning and the other dusting. - Maurenn Murphy

I think it's an absolute disaster that Australia, the government, allowed kangaroo culling. - Steve Irwin

Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It's already tomorrow in Australia. - Charles M. Schulz

Every thought is a seed. If you plant crab apples, don't count on harvesting Golden Delicious. - Bill Meyer

It is only the farmer who faithfully plants seeds in the Spring, who reaps a harvest in the Autumn. - B C Forbes

You were designed for accomplishment, engineered for success, and endowed with the seeds of greatness. - Zig Ziglar

Dreams are the seeds of change. Nothing ever grows without a seed, and nothing ever changes without a dream. - Debby Boone

If you're riding ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there. - Will Rogers

Life is like a good watermelon, sweet and juicy... but you still have to pick out the seeds to enjoy every bit of it. - Unknown

Plant seeds of happiness, hope, success, and love; it will all come back to you in abundance. This is the law of nature. - Steve Maraboli

If you think in terms of a year, plant a seed; if in terms of ten years, plant trees; if in terms of 100 years, teach the people. - Confucius

Hunters will tell you that a moose is a wily and ferocious forest creature. Nonsense. A moose is a cow drawn by a three-year-old. - Bill Bryson

Negative thoughts are like weeds in your garden and positive thoughts are the seeds of your garden, kill the weeds and feed the seeds. - Sukhi Burgen

Canada is like an old cow. The West feeds it. Ontario and Quebec milk it. And you can well imagine what it's doing in the Maritimes. - Tommy Douglas


Mow Your Lawn

Drinking Alone

being Fearless

Bible Bar

A Good Woman

Tunnel Face

Wheelchair Access

Dog Training for Dummies

Pineapple Slicer

Pole Safety

Singapore SkyPark

Nintendo Guitar

Road Detour

Jerushalom

Hot Seat

LippoPotumus

Sidewalk Malt Melt

Senior's Golf Cart

Throwaway Sport Paper

Blonde Geometry Student

Ping Wrong

Tree House

Skull Violins

Finger Phone