Hokey Pokey Clinic

Medicine is the best medicine. - Doctors Anonymous

Laughter is the best medicine. - Joe-kster

Maternity Hospital: An heirport - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

One doctor makes work for another. - English Proverb

A young doctor makes a humpy graveyard. - English Proverb

No medicine cures what happiness cannot. - Gabriel G Marquez

The best doctor gives the least medicines. - Benjamin Franklin

Panic plays no part in the training of a nurse. - Elizabeth Kenny

The No. 1 cause of bankruptcies is medical bills. - Michael Moore

Three out of four doctors recommend another doctor. - Graffito

A half doctor near is better than a whole one far away. - German Proverb

If we become ill, modern medicine can work healing miracles. - Joseph B Wirthlin

A doctor whose breath smells has no right to medical opinion. - Martin H. Fischer

My doctor gave me two weeks to live. I hope they're in August. - Ronnie Shakes

The patient is not likely to recover who makes the doctor his heir. - Thomas Fuller

The last mosquito that bit me had to check into the Betty Ford clinic. - Joanna Lumley

Joy is more divine than sorrow, for joy is bread and sorrow is medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher

The good-news stories in medicine are early detection, early intervention. - Thomas R Insel

A woman doctor is only good for women's problems - like your groinocology - Archie Bunker

The best doctors in the world are Doctor Diet, Doctor Quiet, and Doctor Merryman. - Jonathan Swift

People pay the doctor for his trouble; for his kindness they still remain in his debt. - Seneca

The practice of medicine is a thinker's job, the practice of surgery a plumber's. - Martin H. Fischer

I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course. - Groucho Marx

I wonder why you can always read a Doctor's bill but you can never read his prescription. - Finley Peter Dunne

Most religious people accept medicine as a gift from God and reap the benefits of both realms. - Caroline Fraser

I wondher why ye can always read a doctor's bill an' ye niver can read his purscription. - Finley Peter Dunne

Medicine, the only profession that labours incessantly to destroy the reason for its own existence. - James Bryce

The only equipment lack in the modern hospital? Somebody to meet you at the entrance with a handshake! - Martin H. Fischer

The Christian's Bible is a drug store. Its contents remain the same, but the medical practice changes. - Mark Twain

Finish last in your league and they call you idiot. Finish last in medical school and they call you doctor. - Abe Lemons

There is no medicine like hope, no incentive so great, and no tonic so powerful as expectation of something tomorrow. - Orison Swett Marden

The trained nurse has become one of the great blessings of humanity, taking a place beside the physician and the priest. - William Osler

Medicine is the restoration of discordant elements; sickness is the discord of the elements infused into the living body. - Leonardo da Vinci

I'm planning to adopt a dog soon. It wasn't my first choice but my Doctor told me I can't have any biologically. - Bill Murray

A doctor who cannot take a good history and a patient who cannot give one are in danger of giving and receiving bad treatment. - Unknown

A doctor must work eighteen hours a day and seven days a week. If you cannot console yourself to this, get out of the profession. - Martin H. Fischer

Once in your life you need a doctor, a lawyer, a policeman, and a preacher... but every day, three times a day, you need a farmer. - Brenda Schaepp

I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away. - George Carlin

I see God in every human being. When I wash the leper's wounds, I feel I am nursing the Lord himself. Is it not a beautiful experience? - Mother Teresa

A man who cannot work without his hypodermic needle is a poor doctor. The amount of narcotic you use is inversely proportional to your skill. - Martin H. Fischer