#1 humor site on the 'net

HTML Guy

Web page basics for a Red-neck

HTML Guy thanks to Howard Chapman

What goes between 'head' and 'body' in a web page?

HTML = HyperText Markup Language
The main markup language for displaying web pages

QuotaBills
Keep your heels, head, and standards high. - Unknown

You can't write poetry on the computer. - Quentin Tarantino

Oh, so they have internet on computers now! - Homer Simpson

I took the initiative in creating the internet. - Al Gore

Life without liberty is like a body without spirit. - Khalil Gibran

Never trust a computer you can't throw out a window. - Steve Wozniak

I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks. - Steve Martin

It is hard to fight an enemy who has outposts in your head. - Sally Kempton

You don't have a soul. You are a Soul. You have a body. - C S Lewis

The seat of knowledge is in the head, of wisdom, in the heart. - William Hazlitt

To err is human - and to blame it on a computer is even more so. - Robert Orben

Every tooth in a man's head is more valuable than a diamond. - Miguel de Cervantes

Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined. - Samuel Goldwyn

Take care of your body. It's the only place you have to live. - Jim Rohn

I have the body of an eighteen-year-old. I keep it in the fridge. - Spike Milligan

The internet turns 30 minutes of homework into 2 hours of homework. - Unknown

Salary is no object: I want only enough to keep body and soul apart. - Dorothy Parker

There is but one temple in the universe and that is the body of man. - Novalis

Having a family is like having a bowling alley installed in your head. - Martin Mull

Would you take all these pains about your looks if every body was blind? - Charles Finney

Symptoms are the body's mother tongue; signs are in a foreign language. - John Brown

The fellow that owns his own home is always just coming out of a hardware store. - Kin Hubbard

The best rule of friendship is to keep your heart a little softer than your head. - Unknown

Confidence is like a dragon where, for every head cut off, two more heads grow back. - Criss Jami

Cabbage: A familiar kitchen-garden vegetable about as large and wise as a man's head. - Ambrose Bierce

Whether you're a man or not comes from your heart, not how much hair you have on your head. - Bruce Willis

My physician has become warden of my medically imprisoned body, pharmaceuticals the bars on my cell. - Grey E. Livingston

The reason your golf pro tells you to keep your head down is so that you can't see him laughing. - Phyllis Diller

Tattoos have a power and magic all their own. They decorate the body but they also enhance the soul. - Michelle Delio

You go to your TV to turn your brain off. You go to the computer when you want to turn your brain on. - Steve Jobs

A lot of what passes for depression these days is nothing more than a body saying that it needs work. - Geoffrey Norman

What a surprise to find you could shift the contents of your head like rearranging furniture in a room. - Lisa Alther

My fingers are long and beautiful, as, it has been well been documented, are various other parts of my body. - Donald Trump

My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first being hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint. - Erma Bombeck

A smile is the lightning system of the face, the cooling system of the head, and the heating system of the heart. - Unknown

No one realizes how beautiful it is to travel until he comes home and rests his head on his old, familiar pillow. - Lin Yutang

A good friend will help you move. A really good friend will help you move a body - let me know if I ever need to bring a shovel. - Unknown

Beauty isn't worth thinking about; what's important is your mind. You don't want a fifty-dollar haircut on a fifty-cent head. - Garrison Keillor

Think while walking, walk while thinking, and let writing be but the light pause, as the body on a walk rests in contemplation of wide open spaces. - Frederic Gros

My mother had a slender, small body, but a large heart - a heart so large that everybody's joys found welcome in it, and hospitable accommodation. - Mark Twain


Border Agent Alert

Poopception

Shoe Laces 101

White Out

Lord Of The Rinse

Snow Shield

Canadian Breakdancing

Ninja Raccoon

Newfie Steering Wheel Lock

Marriage Barrier

Redneck Wine Holder

Snow Wall

Cold One

Baby Chat

Window Cleaning On The Edge

Father Time Snowman

Back Pain

No Extras Massage

Gooooooooooogle Air

Hot Tub Hangups

Scenery Cut and Paste

Origin of the Whoopee Cushion

Better With A Beard

Canadian Winter Smile