#1 humor site on the 'net

I Do What I Want

On the cutting edge of unique decisions

I Do What I Want thanks to Wayne Nowazek

Going against the general trend

QuotaBills
Tacos are the food of genius. - Heather Brewer

Food tastes better when you wear it. - Erin Dealey

The most dangerous food is wedding cake. - James Thurber

The best food is whatever fills the belly. - Arab Proverb

A proverb is to speech what salt is to food. - Arabic Proverb

Fame is a fickle food upon a shifting plate. - Emily Dickinson

There is no love sincerer than the love of food. - George Bernard Shaw

Chocolate is more than a food, but less than a drug. - R J Huxtable

Bacon bits are like fairy dust of the food community. - Unknown

Food is not just eating energy. It's an experience. - Guy Fieri

I don't even butter my bread. I consider that cooking. - Katherine Cebrian

I was 32 when I started cooking; up until then, I just ate. - Julia Child

You are only master of food that you haven't yet eaten. - Tibet Proverb

In France, cooking is a serious art form and a national sport. - Julia Child

A meal of bread, cheese, and beer constitutes the perfect food. - Queen Elizabeth I

I'm a bit of a gourmet chef. I love cooking - mostly Thai food. - Will Ferrell

A gourmet who thinks of calories is like a tart who looks at her watch. - James Beard

Short of screaming-hot Thai food, everything can be suitable for kids too. - Guy Fieri

The only time to eat diet food is while you're waiting for the steak to cook. - Julia Child

My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor. - Phyllis Diller

On the Continent people have good food; in England people have good table manners. - George Mikes

The less Holy Spirit we have, the more cake and coffee we need to keep the church going. - Reinhard Bonnke

So long as you have food in your mouth, you have solved all questions for the time being. - Franz Kafka

Thank you, horseradish, for being neither a radish nor a horse. What you are is a liar food. - Jimmy Fallon

The trouble with eating Italian food is that five or six days later, you're hungry again. - George Miller

We're really just the frosting on a cake and we don't know what's inside the cake. - Adam Riess

I'm glad I don't have to hunt for my food. I don't even know where Sandwiches live. - Bill Murray

The shoe that fits one person pinches another; there is no recipe for living that suits all cases. - Carl Jung

Large, naked, raw carrots are acceptable as food only to those who live in hutches awaiting Easter. - Fran Lebowitz

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat. - Alex Levine

I'm not always optimistic. You wouldn't have all cylinders cooking if you were always like Mary Poppins. - Carol Burnett

Sea spaghetti looks like dark fettuccine and has a similar texture - you can get it in health food stores or online. - Yotam Ottolenghi

When you're stressed, eat ice cream, cake, chocolate and sweets. Why? Because stressed spelled backwards is desserts. - Unknown

If another one of my Whole Food friends says my wife should have a home birth, I am going to punch all the soy on the planet. - Patton Oswalt

I like a well-roasted rotisserie chicken and eggs cooked various ways like sunny-side up or scrambled. It's comfort food for me. - Joel Robuchion

Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship.
She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays. - Red Skelton

One of my biggest fears is that I'm going to die alone in my home, and my cats will eat me because I am too dead to open their food cans. - Kelli Jae Baeli

Winter is the time for comfort, for good food and warmth, for the touch of a friendly hand and for a talk beside the fire: it is the time for home. - Edith Sitwell

There is one longing almost as deep and imperious as the desire for food and sleep. It is the desire to be great. It is the desire to be important. - Dale Carnegie

Our food pyramid, the kind of diet that is constantly promoted, is completely warped. It's not based around anything to do with healing your body. - Jessica Origliasso


Keyboard Seating

Bent Over

Whatchamacallit Car

2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Gone To Market

Peak Bernie

Female IT Experts

Obi-Juan Kenobi

Fuse ReplaceMeant

Student Food Strainer

IBITE

Slide-n-Freeze

Lizard Guitar

Electricity Storage

How To Sharpen Pencils

Chevforodge

Free Stuff

Baby Bird Chorus

Hang On

Home Depot Delivery

Sea Painting

Radish Camouflage

Canadian Twins

Big Birth - They Start Off Big At This Hospital