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Kids Meal

Humour for both dinner and license plates

Kids Meal thanks to Julie Kimmel

License Plate humor in Virginia

QuotaBills
Germs: The only things kids will share freely - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Raising kids is a walk in the park. Jurassic Park. - Unknown

Raising kids is part joy and part guerrilla warfare. - Ed Asner

A crude meal, no doubt, but the best of all sauces is hunger. - Edward Abbey

Kids are life's only guaranteed bona fide upside surprise. - Jack Nicholson

On Halloween, the parents sent their kids out looking like me. - Rodney Dangerfield

We've had bad luck with our kids - they've all grown up. - Christopher Morley

As a kid, I got three meals a day. Oatmeal, miss-a-meal and no meal. - Mr. T

Teaching kids to count is fine, but teaching them what counts is best. - Bob Talbert

The last thing my kids ever did to earn money was lose their baby teeth. - Phyllis Diller

Joy Of Motherhood: What a woman experiences when all the kids are in bed - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Short of screaming-hot Thai food, everything can be suitable for kids too. - Guy Fieri

The hardest job kids face today is learning good manners without seeing any. - Fred Astaire

Couch Potato: What Mom finds under the sofa cushions after the kids eat dinner - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor. - Phyllis Diller

The rich take life one financial year at a time. The poor take life one meal at a time. - Mokokoma Mokhonoana

I'm not crazy about reality, but it's still the only place to get a decent meal. - Groucho Marx

Hopefully, kids realize you can do anything you want. Skateboarding can be that gateway. - Ryan Sheckler

The sun looks down on nothing half so good as a household laughing together over a meal. - C S Lewis

I learn things from my kids constantly. Most of their knowledge comes from Snapple caps. - Jimmy Kimmel

If it weren't for baseball, many kids wouldn't know what a millionaire looked like. - Phyllis Diller

Zucchini: Vegetable which can be baked, boiled, fried or steamed before kids refuse to eat it - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Golden Age: When the kids are too old to need baby-sitters and too young to borrow the family car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I just want to make sure when I have kids, I can spend time with them. That's the whole point. - Mark Zuckerberg

I do like to read in bed, but because I have two kids I'm often forced to read in the bathroom. - Eoin Colfer

I do know what my first meal in the next world would be: Spaghetti Aglio e Olio, heavy on everything. - Rachael Ray

Breakfast is my favorite meal. I cook a big one for everyone - bacon and eggs. I own a lot of eggcups. - Emily Mortimer

Every boy needs a role model that he can be proud of and talk about to the other kids in the playground. - Athol Fugard

Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like shovelling the walk before it stops snowing. - Phyllis Diller

One in four kids have either pre-diabetes or diabetes - what I like to call diabesity. How did this happen? - Mark Hyman

Here lies my past.
Good-bye I have kissed it;
Thank you, kids.
I wouldn’t have missed it. - Ogden Nash

You know you're a mom when you go to the store for yourself and come out with a bag of things for your kids. - Unknown

You know your kids are growing up when they stop asking you where they came from and refuse to tell you where they're going. - P.J. O'Rourke

Technology is just a tool. In terms of getting the kids working together and motivating them, the teacher is the most important. - Bill Gates

It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawn mower, snowblower and vacuum cleaner. - Ben Bergor

Having kids - the responsibility of rearing good, kind, ethical, responsible human beings - is the biggest job anyone can embark on. - Maria Shriver

Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman - or a bad woman - it depends on how much happiness you can handle. - George Burns

Fang took the entire family out for coffee and donuts the other night. The kids enjoyed it. It was the first time they'd ever given blood. - Phyllis Diller

Like all parents, my husband and I just do the best we can, and hold our breath and hope we've set aside enough money for our kids' therapy. - Michelle Pfeiffer

If your kids are giving you a headache, follow the directions on the aspirin bottle, especially the part that says, 'keep away from children.' - Susan Savannah


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