Leaky Pipes

Out of water, I am nothing. - Duke Kahanamoku

A plumber's idea of Cleopatra. - WC Fields

Water is the only drink for a wise man. - Henry David Thoreau

Hard Water: The scientific name for ice - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

You bring your own weather to the picnic. - Harlan Coben

Kettle Drum: What musicians boil water in - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The water doesn't know how old you are. - Dara Torres

Sometimes I drink water just to surprise my liver. - WC Fields

Droughts are because god didn't pay his water bill. - Steven Wright

There is no friend like a sister, in calm or stormy weather. - Christina Rossetti

Ice Water? Get some Onions - that'll make your eyes water! - Groucho Marx

I moved to Florida because you don't have to shovel water. - James Randi

It is best to read the weather forecasts before we pray for rain. - Mark Twain

Washable: What a cowboy does, very carefully, with soap and water - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Don't think there are no crocodiles because the water is calm. - Malayan Proverb

This is perfect weather for today's game. Not a breath of air. - Curt Gowdy

You can't trust water: Even a straight stick turns crooked in it. - WC Fields

Somewhere, behind space and time,
Is wetter water, slimier slime. - Rupert Brooke

My wife's an earth sign. I'm a water sign. Together we make mud. - Henny Youngman

The four building blocks of the universe are fire, water, gravel and vinyl. - Dave Barry

When in doubt as to the applicability of a disinfectant, use soap and water. - Martin H. Fischer

It is only in sorrow bad weather masters us; in joy we face the storm and defy it. - Amelia Barr

Advice from your friends is like the weather, some of it is good, some of it is bad. - Unknown

Start writing, no matter what. The water does not flow until the faucet is turned on. - Louis L'Amour

When ya go out there in the water and ya start crossing your longirudes and lassitudes. - Archie Bunker

A woman is like a tea bag; you never know how strong it is until it's in hot water. - Eleanor Roosevelt

I don't make plans, because life is short and unpredictable - much like the weather. - Al Roker

Before enlightenment: chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment: chop wood, carry water. - Zen Buddhist Saying

Be careful not to complain about anything, even the weather, since I am the Author of your circumstances. - Sarah Young

Be ruthless about your calendar - stick to it, hell or high water but create space for unstructured time as well. - Arjun Arora

Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water. - Bob Hope

Competition can damage self-esteem, create anxiety, and lead to cheating and hurt feelings. But so can romantic love. - Mariah Burton Nelson

They invented the three-day bank holiday weekend because you can't lump all the bad weather into just Saturday and Sunday. - Unknown

Don't knock the weather. Nine-tenths of the people couldn't start a conversation if it didn't change once in a while. - Kin Hubbard

It's not what we don't know that hurts us, people say. It's what we believe is true that isn't that does the damage. - Melody Beattie

The trouble with weather forecasting is that it's right too often for us to ignore it, and wrong too often for us to rely on it. - Patrick Young

Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry

Take a music bath once or twice a week for a few seasons, and you will find that it is to the soul what the water bath is to the body. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

A leader is not an administrator who loves to run others, but someone who carries water for his people, so that they can get on with their jobs. - Robert Townsend

If one morning I walked on top of the water across the Potomac River, the headline that afternoon would read: "President Can't Swim." - Lyndon B. Johnson