Mustache Soother

Success is the child of audacity. - Benjamin Disraeli

Every child begins the world again. - Henry David Thoreau

Babies are such a nice way to start people. - Don Herold

It is a wise father that knows his own child. - William Shakespeare

My best birth control now is just to leave the lights on. - Joan Rivers

A child seldom needs a good talking to as a good listening to. - Robert Brault

The only thing worth stealing is a kiss from a sleeping child. - Joe Houldsworth

I look in the mirror through the eyes of the child that was me. - Judy Collins

One year they wanted to make me poster boy - for birth control. - Rodney Dangerfield

There is no cure for birth and death, save to enjoy the interval. - George Santayana

When I was a child, nobody died; but now it happens all the time. - Unknown

I'm a New Wave baby, so I got very stimulated by foreign film. - Jack Nicholson

Having a baby is like trying to push a grand piano through a transom. - Alice Roosevelt Longworth

The last thing my kids ever did to earn money was lose their baby teeth. - Phyllis Diller

Four very powerful words to say to your child: "I believe in you." - Kevin Heath

As a child, my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it. - Buddy Hackett

The most effective form of birth control I know is spending the day with my kids. - Jill Bensley

Every child is an artist. The problem is how to remain an artist once he grows up. - Pablo Picasso

The only time a woman wishes she were a year older is when she is expecting a baby. - Mary Marsh

An ugly baby is a very nasty object, and the prettiest is frightful when undressed. - Queen Victoria

Anyone who thinks the art of conversation is dead ought to tell a child to go to bed. - Robert Gallagher

The most effective kind of education is that a child should play amongst lovely things. - Plato

Every time a child is born it brings with it the hope that God is not yet disappointed in man. - Rabindranath Tagore

Having a child is surely the most beautifully irrational act that two people in love can commit. - Bill Cosby

When I was a little kid we had a sand box. It was a quicksand box. I was an only child... eventually. - Steven Wright

This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer. - Will Rogers

If a child, a spouse, a life partner, or a parent depends on you and your income, you need life insurance. - Suze Orman

Success is the child of drudgery and perseverance. It cannot be coaxed or bribed; pay the price and it is yours. - Orison Swett Marden

The only way we can ever teach a child to say "I'm sorry" is for him to hear it from our lips first. - Kevin Leman

There's no such thing as a tough child - if you parboil them first for seven hours, they always come out tender. - WC Fields

Spare the rod and spoil the child - that is true. But, beside the rod, keep an apple to give him when he has done well. - Martin Luther

You can be childlike without being childish. A child always wants to have fun. Ask yourself, 'Am I having fun?' - Christopher Meloni

Children are smarter than any of us. Know how I know that? I don't know one child with a full time job and children. - Bill Hicks

Every time a child says, "I don't believe in fairies," there is a little fairy somewhere that falls down dead. - Sir James M. Barrie

A child can teach an adult three things: to be happy for no reason; to always be curious; and to fight tirelessly for something. - Paulo Coelho

My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. - Rita Rudner

The wise man is but a clever infant, spelling letters from a hieroglyphical prophetic book, the lexicon of which lies in eternity. - Thomas Carlyle

In a big family the first child is kind of like the first pancake. If it's not perfect, that's okay, there are a lot more coming along. - Antonin Scalia

When you are a mother, you are never really alone in your thoughts. A mother always has to think twice, once for herself and once for her child. - Sophia Loren

Blessed be Providence which has given to each his toy: the doll to the child, the child to the woman, the woman to the man, the man to the devil. - Victor Hugo