Need A Lifeguard?

My true religion is Kindness. - Dalai Lama

Tea is a religion of the art of life. - Okakura Kakuzo

Religion is the opiate of the masses. - Karl Marx

Cantaloupe: Got to get married in Church - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Every religion at its core is exclusive. - Ravi Zacharias

That Meathead calls me a religious phonetic. - Archie Bunker

Religion is the search for ultimate meaning. - Viktor Frankl

Religion is what keeps the poor from murdering the rich. - Napoleon Bonaparte

The Bible tells us to forgive our enemies, not our friends. - Margot Asquith

The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard. - Steven Wright

For the man who prays in his heart, the whole world is a church. - Sylvain of Athos

If men are so wicked with religion, what would they be without it? - Benjamin Franklin

There is only one religion, though there are a hundred versions of it. - George Bernard Shaw

I once heard a preacher who sorely tempted me to go to church no more. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

My religious background is that my mother is a Christian Dior Scientist. - Robin Williams

Give me a couple of pages of the Bible, and I'll give you a picture. - Cecil B. DeMille

A thorough knowledge of the Bible is worth more than a college education. - Theodore Roosevelt

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult. - Rita Rudner

I see religion more as a truck stop on your way to figuring out who you are. - Brad Pitt

There is a world of practical religion in simply being considerate of others. - Roger Babson

Church is the only society on earth that exists for the benefit of non-members. - William Temple

I won't take my religion from any man who never works except with his mouth. - Carl Sandburg

You can always borrow a corkscrew from a member of the Protestant Episcopal Church. - Chauncey Depew

A religion that gives nothing, costs nothing, and suffers nothing, is worth nothing. - Martin Luther

The first time I sang in the Church choir, two hundred people changed their religion. - Fred Allen

I built my church on Easter services, Christmas Eve services, and Norman Vincent Peale. - Robert H. Schuller

The less Holy Spirit we have, the more cake and coffee we need to keep the church going. - Reinhard Bonnke

Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction. - Blaise Pascal

Religion is like a map. The route isn't important. It's the destination that matters. - Marianne Williamson

I am the indoctrinated child of two lapsed Irish Catholics. Which is to say: I am not religious. - Meghan O'Rourke

He was of the faith chiefly in the sense that the church he currently did not attend was Catholic. - Kingsley Amis

The task of organized religion is not to prove that God was in the 1st century, but that he is in the 20th. - S.H. Miller

The Muslim world is threatened by religious fanaticism. The Western world is threatened by secular fanaticism. - Dennis Prager

The bulletin board on the lawn of a New Jersey Church reads "We reserve the right to accept everybody." - John Kazmark

It ain't those parts of the Bible that I can't understand that bother me, it is the parts that I do understand. - Mark Twain

Question everything. Your love, your religion, your passion. If you don't have questions, you'll never find answers. - Colleen Hoover

The secret of my success? It is simple. It is found in the Bible, 'In all thy ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct thy paths.' - George Washington Carver

I ain't got no respect for no religion where the head guy claims he can't make no mistakes. Like he's, waddya call, inflammable. - Archie Bunker

Only through repentance and faith in Christ can anyone be saved. No religious activity will be sufficient, only true faith in Jesus Christ alone. - Ravi Zacharias

The hallmark of religion is to distrust claims made for mortal men. It is in ages of great religious faith that great skepticism can find expression. - Malcolm Muggeridge