#1 humor site on the 'net

New Year's Wish

Wishing you happiness, fun, success, good health, good luck and joy

New Year's Wish thanks to Jim Serritella

Spreading cheer throughout the year

QuotaBills
I wish I knew how to quit you. - Cookie Monster

I wish he would explain his explanation. - Lord Byron

Sometime the peacock wish to be the seagull. - Jamaican Saying

When I go I'll take New Year's Eve with me. - Guy Lombardo

It takes as much energy to wish as it does to plan. - Eleanor Roosevelt

You must be the change you wish to see in the world. - Mahatma Gandhi

Like dreams, statistics are a form of wish fulfillment. - Jean Baudrillard

If you wish to die young, make your physician your heir. - Romania Proverb

We are no longer happy, so soon as we wish to be happier. - Walter Savage Landor

Face reality as it is, not as it was or as you wish it to be. - Jack Welch

It wouldn't be New Year's if I didn't have regrets. - William Thomas

Fears are educated into us, and can, if we wish, be educated out. - Karl Augustus Menninger

What we need is not the will to believe, but the wish to find out. - Bertrand Russell

Every man regards his own life as the New Year’s Eve of time. - Jean Paul Richter

I wish the government would put a tax on pianos for the incompetent. - Edith Sitwell

All wish to possess knowledge, but few are willing to pay the price. - Juvenal

Many people look forward to the new year for a new start on old habits. - Unknown

Plenty of people wish to become devout, but no one wishes to be humble. - Joseph Addison

Your own resolution to succeed is more important than any other one thing. - Abraham Lincoln

Some people want it to happen, some wish it would happen. Others make it happen. - Benjamin Disraeli

Sometimes you just got to give yourself what you wish someone else would give you. - Dr. Phil

There are only two kinds of people in the world: the Irish and those who wish they were. - Irish Saying

My uncle's dying wish was to have me sitting in his lap; he was in the electric chair. - Rodney Dangerfield

Pull the string, and it will follow wherever you wish. Push it, and it will go nowhere at all. - Dwight D Eisenhower

I wish to be cremated. One tenth of my ashes shall be given to my agent, as written in our contract. - Groucho Marx

The object of a new year is not that we should have a new year. It is that we should have a new soul. - G K Chesterton

But can one still make resolutions when one is over forty? I live according to twenty-year-old habits. - Andre Gide

New Year's Eve, where auld acquaintance be forgot. Unless, of course, those tests come back positive. - Jay Leno

Be always at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let each new year find you a better man. - Benjamin Franklin

Family, religion, friendship... these are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business. - Mr. Burns

I wish I could stand on a busy street corner, hat in hand and beg people to throw me all of their wasted hours. - Bernard Berenson

An individual starts off by facing his problem with resolution, but a convention saves the resolution for the end. - Unknown

New Year's Resolution: To tolerate fools more gladly, provided this does not encourage them to take up more of my time. - James Agate

Enthusiasm is the best protection in any situation. Wholeheartedness is contagious. Give yourself if you wish to get others. - David Seabury

Peace is not something you wish for; it's something you make, something you do, something you are, something you give away. - Unknown

Sometimes I feel like a groundhog. I wish that every time I saw my workplace I could just go down the hole and go off to sleep. - Sherry Bane

If I had one wish for my children, it would be that each of them would reach for goals that have meaning for them as individuals. - Lillian Carter

I wish I had a nickel for every song that I've left in the bathroom, written down on a matchbox, or just totally forgotten about. - Tommy Shaw

Try your best to treat others as you would wish to be treated yourself, and you will find that this is the shortest way to benevolence. - Mencius

There are always three speeches, for every one you actually gave. The one you practiced, the one you gave, and the one you wish you gave. - Dale Carnegie


Tea For Two

Paint Pants

Sea Sand Art

Grief Bacon

Respect For Grapes

Up Purriscope

Fresh Chicken

Ice Climbing Building

2020 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars (3)

Does Your Hedgehog Bite?

Lazy Line Painters

Vegan Brownies

From Start To Finish

Milkshake Diet

Hand Speech

Software Cake

Bland Entrance

Preikestolen Pulpit Rock

Redneck Firemen

Side Rail

Icy Grip Of Winter

Brace For The Resolutioners

Shining Armor Knight

Icicle Drinks