#1 humor site on the 'net

Olive Weather Forecast

How olives swing in Israel

Olive Weather Forecast thanks to joe-kster

Weather predictions at the Olive Tree Hotel in Jerusalem

QuotaBills
Chili: Edible weather - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Off-the-docks Jews (Orthodox Jews) - Archie Bunker

Weather forecast for tonight: dark. - George Carlin

Cursing the weather is never good farming. - English Proverb

Climate is what we expect. Weather is what we get. - Mark Twain

An end is in sight to the severe weather shortage. - Ian Macaskill

Jesus was a Jew, yes, but only on his mother's side. - Archie Bunker

If it weren't for the olive, I'd starve to death. - Unknown

He knows his olive trees better than he knows his children. - Rebecca Helm-Ropelato

I'm kosher except for times where I eat pork and shellfish. - Roseanne Barr

I don't think anyone has been slandered more than the Jews. - Fidel Castro

This is perfect weather for today's game. Not a breath of air. - Curt Gowdy

Everybody talks about the weather, but nobody does anything about it. - Charles Dudley Warner

Jews don't drink much because it interferes with their suffering. - Milton Berle

Conversation about the weather is the last refuge of the unimaginative. - Oscar Wilde

I drink too much. Last time I gave a urine sample there was an olive in it. - Rodney Dangerfield

Wherever you go, no matter what the weather, always bring your own sunshine. - Anthony J. D'Angelo

News events are like Texas weather. If you don't like it, wait a minute. - Jessica Savitch

It is only in sorrow bad weather masters us; in joy we face the storm and defy it. - Amelia Barr

Advice from your friends is like the weather, some of it is good, some of it is bad. - Unknown

You still can't find Israel on a map of the Middle East in a Palestinian schoolbook. - Suzanne Fields

It took one night to get Israel out of Egypt but forty years to get Egypt out of Israel. - George Morrison

I'm leaving because the weather is too good. I hate London when it's not raining. - Groucho Marx

Let's get an extended weather forecast from a jittery, inconsistent, reddish brown rodent. - Unknown

The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing. - Steven Wright

It's not my fault I was dragged out of my house by a mob and forced to predict the weather. - Punxsutawney Phil

Anytime a person goes into a delicatessen and orders a pastrami on white bread, somewhere a Jew dies. - Milton Berle

Be careful not to complain about anything, even the weather, since I am the Author of your circumstances. - Sarah Young

I have drawn inspiration from the Marine Corps, the Jewish struggle in Palestine and Israel, and the Irish. - Leon Uris

A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back when it begins to rain. - Robert Frost

They invented the three-day bank holiday weekend because you can't lump all the bad weather into just Saturday and Sunday. - Unknown

Life is no different than the weather. Not only is it unpredictable, but it shows us a new perspective of the world every day. - Suzy Kassem

Don't knock the weather. Nine-tenths of the people couldn't start a conversation if it didn't change once in a while. - Kin Hubbard

The trouble with weather forecasting is that it's right too often for us to ignore it, and wrong too often for us to rely on it. - Patrick Young

The long, dull, monotonous years of middle-aged prosperity or middle-aged adversity are excellent campaigning weather for the devil. - C S Lewis

It goes back to Christianity's affiliation with Judaism as Passover. Easter is as important to Christians as Passover is to the Jews. - Glenn Duffy

Reporter to Beatles during their first US tour: "How do you find America?"
Ringo Starr: "Turn left at Greenland." - Ringo Starr

I come bearing an olive branch in one hand, and the freedom fighter's gun in the other. Do not let the olive branch fall from my hand. - Yasser Arafat

Iron rusts from disuse; stagnant water loses its purity and in cold weather becomes frozen; even so does inaction sap the vigor of the mind. - Leonardo da Vinci

Money is like gasoline during a road trip. You don't want to run out of gas on your trip, but you're not doing a tour of gas stations. - Tim O'Reilly


Camouflage Face

Crab Bridge

Illusive Animal Kingdom

Off The Wall Biker

Buffalo Art

TitanoBoa

Secret Graduation Gift

Fish Fingers

I'll Be Right There

Redneck Sandals

Down Under Statue

Ventriloquist Isolation

Dr. Hedgehog

Flower Frame Heels

PEI Weather

Frankfurt Subway Entrance

Shopping With Your Husband

Where is Waldo?

Costco Beach Towel

Handwritting

July 4th Balloon

Maritime Treat

Redneck Wheelchair Stroller

Reflective Art