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Pet Food Tester

Little Johnny prefers pet food to veggies

Pet Food Tester thanks to Mike King

Mom, can I lick the bowl?

QuotaBills
Love me, love my dog. - English Proverb

Newborn Baby: Fresh heir - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A hard dog to keep on the porch. - Hillary Clinton

Burn rubber, not your soul, baby. - Craig Fernandez

Zit: Command given to a spotted dog - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A dog has the soul of a philosopher. - Plato

Stoic: De boid what brings de babies - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A hungry dog will eat dirty puddings. - Latin Proverb

Lassitude: A heroic dog with attitude - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

My little dog - a heartbeat at my feet. - Edith Wharton

A dog in desperation will leap over a wall. - Unknown

Babies are such a nice way to start people. - Don Herold

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture. - Phyllis Diller

A baby is an inestimable blessing and a bother. - Mark Twain

A good bone does not always come to a good dog. - French Proverb

De-caffeinated: What a cow gets when it has a baby - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

If a man be great, even his dog will ear a proud look. - Japanese Proverb

The scalded dog fears hot water, and afterwards, cold. - Italian Proverb

I'll get you, my pretty, and your little dog, too! - The Wizard of Oz

Better to be the head of a dog than the tail of a lion. - English Proverb

Gigantic: The biggest, scariest bug in your dog's fur - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Hot Dog: The only animal that feeds the hand that bites it - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Every baby born into the world is a finer one than the last. - Charles Dickens

I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog. - Wendy Liebman

Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called "Ego". - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Only a biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of a car window. - Unknown

No man should live where he can hear his neighbor's dog bark. - Nathaniel Macon

I'm a New Wave baby, so I got very stimulated by foreign film. - Jack Nicholson

I had rather hear my dog bark at a crow, than a man swear he loves me. - William Shakespeare

Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog. - Franklin P Jones

The last thing my kids ever did to earn money was lose their baby teeth. - Phyllis Diller

Insomnia: a contagious disease often transmitted from babies to parents. - Shannon Fife

To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs. - Aldous Huxley

Why can't a woman be more like a dog, huh? So sweet, loving, attentive. - Kirk Douglas

The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he is a baby. - Natalie Wood

I look like a real bag lady when I go to Starbucks with my dog and get my chai. - Shirley MacLaine

The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he's a baby. - Natalie Wood

Every boy should have two things: a dog and a mother willing to let him have one. - Unknown

I am obsessed with Costco. I love the salmon and rotisserie chicken, the dog beds. - Kris Jenner

An ugly baby is a very nasty object, and the prettiest is frightful when undressed. - Queen Victoria

The firsts go away - first love, first baby, first kiss. You have to create new ones. - Sarah Jessica Parker

Life is like a dogsled team. If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never changes. - Lewis Grizzard

Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in. - Mark Twain

If newborn babies could speak they would be the most intelligent beings on planet earth. - Jaden Smith

Chutzpapa: A father who wakes his wife at 4 a.m. so she can change the baby's diaper - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. - Ann Landers

I love working in Canada. The ovation is great. It makes me feel like I'm the top dog. - Owen Hart

Feedback: The inevitable result when your baby doesn’t appreciate the strained carrots - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down. - Robert Benchley

I'm beginning to have morning sickness. I'm not having a baby, I'm just sick of morning. - Phyllis Diller

What a pity Hell's gates are not kept by O'Flynn
The surly old dog would let nobody in. - Patrick Ireland

If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: pour a little Lavoris in the toilet. - Jay Leno

You know what it's like having five kids? Imagine you're drowning. And someone hands you a baby. - Jim Gaffigan

This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer. - Will Rogers

I'm suspicious of people who don't like dogs, but I trust a dog when it doesn't like a person. - Unknown

America is a large, friendly dog in a very small room. Every time it wags its tail, it knocks over a chair. - Arnold Toynbee

Ever wonder where you'd end up if you took your dog for a walk and never once pulled back on the leash? - Robert Brault

When a dog bites a man, that is not news, because it happens so often. But if a man bites a dog, that is news. - John B. Bogart

If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around. - Unknown

My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies. - WC Fields

When your children are teenagers, it's important to have a dog so that someone in the house is happy to see you. - Nora Ephron

Since people are going to be living longer and getting older, they'll just have to learn how to be babies longer. - Andy Warhol

I'm planning to adopt a dog soon. It wasn't my first choice but my Doctor told me I can't have any biologically. - Bill Murray

I still play hockey every now and then, and I still golf. But my biggest exercise is walking my big dog in the park every day. - Michael J. Fox

Babies are bits of stardust, blown from the hand of God. Lucky the woman who knows the pangs of birth, for she has held a star. - Larry Barratto

If a dog jumps in your lap, it is because he is fond of you; but if a cat does the same thing, it is because your lap is warmer. - Alfred N Whitehead

No one ever wants to see his or her name linked to anything bad. Conscience is like a baby. It has to go to sleep before you can. - Harvey Mackay

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man. - Mark Twain

I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. - Steven Wright

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks? - George Carlin


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