Police Rides

If it swells, ride it! - Unknown

Never let the tail wag the dog. - Unknown

Horse ovaries (hors d'oeuvres) - Archie Bunker

Use a little of your horse's sense. - Archie Bunker

The more I see of men, the more I like dogs. - Madame de Stael

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture. - Phyllis Diller

Throw physic to the dogs; I'll none of it. - William Shakespeare

A unicorn is just a horse with a point of view. - Ron Sexsmith

The old horse in the stable still yearns to run. - Mongolian Proverb

Marry me and I'll never look at another horse! - Groucho Marx

The police are recruited from the criminal classes. - Gore Vidal

One trained dog equals 60 search-and-rescue workers. - Charles Stoehr

The dog who meets with a good master is the happier of the two. - Maurice Maeterlinck

The only thing worse than beating a dead horse is betting on one. - Relient K

Have fun, be active. Ride a bike instead of driving, for example. - Dan Buettner

You can not lead a battle if you think you look silly on a horse. - Napoleon Bonaparte

A lame cat is better than a swift horse when rats infest the palace. - Chinese Proverb

Your body is not a temple, it's an amusement park. Enjoy the ride. - Anthony Bourdain

It is a lot harder now to be a police officer than what it used to be. - Steven Seagal

It was a great interview process. They were fighting like cats and dogs. - Donald Trump

A horse doesn't care how much you know until it knows how much you care. - Tom Smith

I look like a real bag lady when I go to Starbucks with my dog and get my chai. - Shirley MacLaine

The more I see of the representatives of the people, the more I admire my dogs. - Alphonse de Lamartine

The Holy Father's newest Encyclacle? Like anyone cares what he rides around on. - Archie Bunker

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. - Jeff Valdez

I'm the only woman who can walk in Central Park at night... and reduce the crime rate. - Phyllis Diller

Thank you, horseradish, for being neither a radish nor a horse. What you are is a liar food. - Jimmy Fallon

A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down. - Robert Benchley

Democracy is very different in U.S. and A. from Kazakhstan. In America, woman can vote, but horse cannot! - Borat Sagdiyev

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass! - Rodney Dangerfield

There are two things in this world that don't last long: dogs chasing cars, and pros putting for pars. - Lee Travino

The true identity theft is not financial. It's not in cyberspace. It's spiritual. It's been taken. - Stephen Covey

I still play hockey every now and then, and I still golf. But my biggest exercise is walking my big dog in the park every day. - Michael J. Fox

God moves in a mysterious way
His wonders to perform;
He plants His footsteps in the sea
And rides upon the storm. - William Cowper

My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. - Rita Rudner

The trout enjoys the river,
The whale enjoys the sea,
And dogs love most an old lamp-post,
But you're my cup of tea. - W H Auden

Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down. - Oprah Winfrey

If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much. - Mark Twain

Among God's creatures two, the dog and the guitar, have taken all the sizes and all the shapes, in order not to be separated from the man. - Andres Segovia

Homosexuality in Russia is a crime and the punishment is seven years in prison, locked up with the other men. There is a three year waiting list. - Yakov Smirnoff