Real Men Don't Snowboard, they Volcano Board

All real men love to eat. - Marlene Dietrich

I'm a golfer, not an athlete. - Lee Westwood

Sports is human life in microcosm. - Howard Cosell

Extreme hopes are born from extreme misery. - Bertrand Russell

When I'm feeling athletic, I go to a sports bar. - Paul Clisura

In sports, every day you can be the hero or the goat. - Geoff Stults

Deer hunting would be fine sport, if only the deer had guns. - W S Gilbert

In France, cooking is a serious art form and a national sport. - Julia Child

The largest room available to athletes is room for improvement. - Unknown

In Russia, if a male athlete loses he becomes a female athlete. - Yakov Smirnoff

I like sports, and I enjoy playing basketball and lifting weights. - Joel Osteen

I love various sports, including basketball, tennis and billiards. - Yani Tseng

In love as in sport, the amateur status must be strictly maintained. - Robert Graves

Immodium Podium: why some athletes didn’t make it to the podium - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

We are in the extreme centre, the radical middle. That is our position. - Pierre Trudeau

The trouble with being a good sport is that you have to lose to prove it. - Croft M. Pentz

Athlete: A dignified bunch of muscles, unable to split wood or sift ashes - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

These days there are not many sports owners who have ever worn the jockstrap. - George Steinbrenner

I love sports. Whenever I can, I always watch the Detroit Tigers on the radio. - Gerald R. Ford

Football Game: A sport where a spectator takes four quarters to finish a fifth - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Surfing's one of the few sports that you look ahead to see what's behind. - Laird Hamilton

Hunting is not a sport. In a sport, both sides should know they're in the game. - Paul Rodriguez

If all the year were playing holidays,
To sport would be as tedious as to work. - William Shakespeare

Husband-hunting: A sport in which the animal that gets caught has to buy the license - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A great athlete does not come from muscle, speed, and skill, but from the mind first. - Dan E. Welker

I exercise extreme self control. I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast. - WC Fields

Football isn't a contact sport; it's a collision sport. Dancing is a contact sport. - Vince Lombardi

Karate's a very boring sport, but when you know the technique you can go further and further. - Jean-Claude Van Damme

Men forget everything; women remember everything. That's why men need instant replays in sports. - Rita Rudner

A laugh is a surprise. And all humor is physical. I was always athletic, so that came naturally to me. - Chevy Chase

There are only 3 true sports: mountain climbing, bull fighting and auto racing. All the rest are games. - Ernest Hemingway

Golf is like any other sports competition. There is not a whole lot of point to it unless someone suffers. - Kevin Wohl

When a man wants to murder a tiger he calls it sport; when a tiger wants to murder him he calls it ferocity. - George Bernard Shaw

I played basketball in high school, and I love watching sports - I'll watch everything except maybe hockey. - Andy Roddick

Mankind likes to think in terms of extreme opposites - between which it recognizes no intermediate possibilities. - John Dewey

I am getting to an age when I can only enjoy the last sport left. It is called 'hunting for your spectacles.' - Edward Grey

Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps. - Tiger Woods

People are often quite surprised by the sport and leisure activities practised by the blind. For example, tandem cycling is very popular. - Andrea Bocelli

The joy of surfing is so many things combined, from the physical exertion of it, to the challenge of it, to the mental side of the sport. - Kelly Slater

In the marathon a crazy athlete can just keep pushing from the beginning; at a championship you don't need a time just to win the race. - Haile Gebrelassie