Ruined Day

Love me, love my dog. - English Proverb

Let fightin' dogs lie - Archie Bunker

The dog is the god of frolic. - Henry Ward Beecher

Lassitude: A heroic dog with attitude - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I am I because my little dog knows me. - Gertrude Stein

The view only changes for the lead dog. - Norman O. Brown

A year's care; a minute's ruin. - Filipino Proverb

Hollywood is like Picasso's bathroom. - Candice Bergen

Get the hanging dog expression off your face. - Archie Bunker

If you want a friend in Washington, get a dog. - Harry S Truman

Throw physic to the dogs; I'll none of it. - William Shakespeare

Don't think to hunt two hares with one dog. - Benjamin Franklin

I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone. - Steven Wright

Be on your guard against a silent dog and still water. - Latin Proverb

If a man be great, even his dog will ear a proud look. - Japanese Proverb

The scalded dog fears hot water, and afterwards, cold. - Italian Proverb

Gigantic: The biggest, scariest bug in your dog's fur - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I used to be a People Person but people ruined that for me. - Unknown

My wife's such a bad cook, the dog begs for Alka-Seltzer. - Rodney Dangerfield

Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called "Ego". - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Every bathroom in my house will ultimately have a Toto bidet in it. - Ken Marino

To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs. - Aldous Huxley

The trees in Siberia are miles apart - that's why the dogs are so fast. - Bob Hope

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself. - Josh Billings

I threw the kitchen sink at him, but he went to the bathroom and got his tub. - Andy Roddick

Bargain Sale: A place where a woman can ruin one dress while she buys another - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I'd rather be able to face myself in the bathroom mirror than be rich and famous. - Ani DiFranco

Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in. - Mark Twain

Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. - Ann Landers

It's not the size of the dog in the fight - it's the size of the fight in the dog. - Mark Twain

A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down. - Robert Benchley

If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: pour a little Lavoris in the toilet. - Jay Leno

If you turn the imagination loose like a hunting dog, it will often return with the bird in its mouth. - William Maxwell

Obama and his attack dogs have nothing but hate and anger in their hearts and spew it whenever possible. - Donald Trump

Ever wonder where you'd end up if you took your dog for a walk and never once pulled back on the leash? - Robert Brault

The best measure of a man's honesty isn't his income tax return. It's the zero adjust on his bathroom scale. - Arthur C. Clarke

We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet, so we bought a dog. It's cheaper and you get more feet. - Rita Rudner

It is the eye of other people that ruin us. If I were blind I would want, neither fine clothes, fine houses or fine furniture. - Benjamin Franklin

I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. - Steven Wright

My life is the land, the dogs, the car, the motorcycle, the pond, the canoe, going to pick up mail. It's just a rural retreat that I enjoy. - Burt Shavitz