#1 humor site on the 'net

Ruined Day

Someone's day is about to be ruined

Ruined Day thanks to Howard Chapman

Countdown to a warm shower

QuotaBills
Love me, love my dog. - English Proverb

Let fightin' dogs lie - Archie Bunker

The dog is the god of frolic. - Henry Ward Beecher

Lassitude: A heroic dog with attitude - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I am I because my little dog knows me. - Gertrude Stein

The view only changes for the lead dog. - Norman O. Brown

A year's care; a minute's ruin. - Filipino Proverb

Hollywood is like Picasso's bathroom. - Candice Bergen

Get the hanging dog expression off your face. - Archie Bunker

If you want a friend in Washington, get a dog. - Harry S Truman

Throw physic to the dogs; I'll none of it. - William Shakespeare

Don't think to hunt two hares with one dog. - Benjamin Franklin

I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone. - Steven Wright

Be on your guard against a silent dog and still water. - Latin Proverb

If a man be great, even his dog will ear a proud look. - Japanese Proverb

The scalded dog fears hot water, and afterwards, cold. - Italian Proverb

Gigantic: The biggest, scariest bug in your dog's fur - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I used to be a People Person but people ruined that for me. - Unknown

My wife's such a bad cook, the dog begs for Alka-Seltzer. - Rodney Dangerfield

Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called "Ego". - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Every bathroom in my house will ultimately have a Toto bidet in it. - Ken Marino

To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs. - Aldous Huxley

The trees in Siberia are miles apart - that's why the dogs are so fast. - Bob Hope

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself. - Josh Billings

I threw the kitchen sink at him, but he went to the bathroom and got his tub. - Andy Roddick

Bargain Sale: A place where a woman can ruin one dress while she buys another - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I'd rather be able to face myself in the bathroom mirror than be rich and famous. - Ani DiFranco

Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in. - Mark Twain

Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. - Ann Landers

It's not the size of the dog in the fight - it's the size of the fight in the dog. - Mark Twain

A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down. - Robert Benchley

If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: pour a little Lavoris in the toilet. - Jay Leno

If you turn the imagination loose like a hunting dog, it will often return with the bird in its mouth. - William Maxwell

Obama and his attack dogs have nothing but hate and anger in their hearts and spew it whenever possible. - Donald Trump

Ever wonder where you'd end up if you took your dog for a walk and never once pulled back on the leash? - Robert Brault

The best measure of a man's honesty isn't his income tax return. It's the zero adjust on his bathroom scale. - Arthur C. Clarke

We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet, so we bought a dog. It's cheaper and you get more feet. - Rita Rudner

It is the eye of other people that ruin us. If I were blind I would want, neither fine clothes, fine houses or fine furniture. - Benjamin Franklin

I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. - Steven Wright

My life is the land, the dogs, the car, the motorcycle, the pond, the canoe, going to pick up mail. It's just a rural retreat that I enjoy. - Burt Shavitz


Hug Me

A Shark Ate My Homework

Victorian Bathing Machine

Winter in Wyoming

He Looks Just Like His Father!

Key Frame

Jet Propelled Eagle

Frisbee Dog

Studley Tool Chest

Dog Balance

We Haul It All

3 Stages Of A Man's Life

TurbAnne - India's Iron Lady

Italian Fire Exit

2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Obesity Is OK

Frost Bite

Spaghetti Western

Nobody Is Above Suspicion At Customs

Squirmy Jelly Worms

Sharkalanche

Daily Rain Gauge

Sandwich Shoes

Bicycle Skates