#1 humor site on the 'net

Senior Beer Drinker's Bar

Self-serve brewery makes bartenders obsolete

Your personal one-stop pass-through brewskie store
Senior Beer Drinker's Bar thanks to Jim Serritella

Pub brewery with all the extras for a long drink ... Customers spend hours at this Irish pub

QuotaBills
Save water - drink vodka. - Unknown

Payday came and with it beer. - Rudyard Kipling

Liquor Store: A stupor market - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Good wine is a necessity of life. - Thomas Jefferson

Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker. - Ogden Nash

Religions change; beer and wine remain. - Hervey Allen

Hollywood is like Picasso's bathroom. - Candice Bergen

I like my whiskey old and my women young. - Errol Flynn

One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. - George Carlin

Everything's better with bacon and red wine. - Dianne Harman

Always go to the bathroom when you have a chance. - King George V

Bladder: The human apparatus that pays the tax on beer - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Igloo: 1. An icicle built for two; 2. An Alaskan toilet. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Ah, beer, my one weakness. My Achilles heel, if you will. - Homer Simpson

I would rather sleep in a bathroom than in another hotel. - Billy Wilder

If God forbade drinking, would He have made wine so good? - Cardinal Richelieu

It was 2:00 p.m., too early for wine but not for chocolate. - Andrea Hurst

Aging seems to be the only available way to live a long life. - Daniel F E Auber

Drinking rum before noon makes you a pirate, not an alcoholic. - Unknown

There's a lot involved in going to the bathroom for women. - Leah Remini

God invented whiskey to prevent the Irish from ruling the world. - Irish Saying

Memorial services are the cocktail parties of the geriatric set. - Ralph Richardson

Ah, good ol' trustworthy beer. My love for you will never die. - Homer Simpson

Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy. - Benjamin Franklin

I'll have a "Cafe Mocha Vodka Valium Latte" to go, please. - Unknown

Cash Flow: The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I started singing in the bathroom. Nothing was coming out. It was ghastly. - Rod Stewart

I threw the kitchen sink at him, but he went to the bathroom and got his tub. - Andy Roddick

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin

There are two things that Jack Bauer never does. Show mercy, and go to the bathroom. - Kiefer Sutherland

At Disneyland, you never go 'backstage' - even when you're in the bathroom. - Hideo Kojima

France is a country where the money falls apart but you can't tear the toilet paper. - Billy Wilder

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

Jitterbug: 1. A Scotchman in front of a pay toilet; 2. Insect that's had too much coffee. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Wine makes a man more pleased with himself. I do not say it makes him more pleasing to others. - Samuel Johnson

Just as Jesus created wine from water, we humans are capable of transmuting emotion into music. - Carlos Santana

An Irishman after trying American beer for the first time: "Put it back in the horse!" - Unknown

He's so full of alcohol, if you put a lighted wick in his mouth he'd burn for three days. - Groucho Marx

I do like to read in bed, but because I have two kids I'm often forced to read in the bathroom. - Eoin Colfer

If you have to choose between drinking wine every day or being skinny, which would you choose: Red or White? - Unknown

There is more refreshment and stimulation in a nap, even of the briefest, than in all the alcohol ever distilled. - Ovid

I have this theory that chocolate slows down the aging process. It may not be true, but do I dare take the chance? - Unknown

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. - George Carlin

We have embarked upon the world's largest and longest cocktail party, and every issue imaginable is up for grabs. - Geoffrey Moore

I'd learned some things. I knew you weren't supposed to hold a good wine at the top - the paper bag falls off. - Pat Paulsen

The Bible's full of wine. God ain't got nothing against a little drink to celebrate His Son's birthday with. - Archie Bunker

It was so quiet, a reservation kind of quiet, where you can hear somebody drinking whiskey on the rocks three miles away. - Sherman Alexie

Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry

Men who consistently leave the toilet seat up secretly want women to get up to go the bathroom in the middle of the night and fall in. - Rita Rudner

Alcohol is not in my vodkabulary. However, I looked it up on whiskeypedia and learned if you drink too much of it, it's likely tequilya. - Unknown


Hog Hunter

Magic Puppies

Log Sticks

Tree Face

Camper Tank

Shipley Donut Pants

Distressing Artwork

Child's Motorcycle Helmet

Montana Mountain Bike

Sealtastic

Bland Entrance

Cruising Advice

Cat Dugout

Open Drive Through

Secret Revealed

Tired Flagpole

Bent Car Sculpture

Cow Jacket

Thanks For Noticing

Overflow Truck Garden

Beach Sign Training

Encouraging Seal

GMC Pool

Nature Calls