#1 humor site on the 'net

Shark Week Theme Song

Closing out Shark Week with a final catch of the week

Shark Week Theme Song thanks to Brad Kemph

Online sheet music with underwater lyrics

QuotaBills
Canned music is like audible wallpaper. - Alistair Cooke

Extraordinary how potent cheap music is. - Noel Coward

Rock and roll: music for the neck downwards. - Keith Richards

Music is well said to be the speech of angels. - Thomas Carlyle

Music is what our soul sounds like when it sings. - Xila Toro

Life is one grand, sweet song, so start the music. - Ronald Reagan

My dad's Irish music was such a huge influence. - Dido Armstrong

My music is best understood by children and animals. - Igor Stravinsky

A shop should be like a song of which you never tire. - Harry Gordon Selfridge

Life exists for the love of music or beautiful things. - G K Chesterton

Music is the art which is most nigh to tears and memory. - Oscar Wilde

There are 350 varieties of shark, not counting loan and pool. - L.M. Boyd

Yoga is almost like music in a way; there's no end to it. - Sting

Learning music by reading about it is like making love by mail. - Luciano Pavarotti

Some days there won't be a song in your heart. Sing anyway. - Emory Austin

Classical music is the kind we keep thinking will turn into a tune. - Kin Hubbard

If you want to change the world, don't back down from the sharks! - William H. McRaven

I don't use simple words. I make games and puzzles with my songs. - Lisa Loeb

All music is folk music. I ain't never heard no horse sing a song. - Louis Armstrong

My metabolism stinks. I can gain weight just listening to dinner music. - Ron Dentinger

I don't know anything about music. In my line you don't have to. - Elvis Presley

If it weren't for the rocks in its bed, the stream would have no song. - Carl Perkins

Music is the only language in which you cannot say a mean or sarcastic thing. - John Erskine

The song that we hear with our ears is only the song that is sung in our hearts. - Ouida

Music has charms to sooth a savage breast, to soften rocks, or bend a knotted oak. - William Congreve

Film is one of the three universal languages, the other two: mathematics and music. - Frank Capra

If I swim in the ocean, I have a shark thought. Not a bad one, but just a little one. - Tea Leoni

Do not abandon yourselves to despair. We are the Easter people and hallelujah is our song. - Pope John Paul II

Are you a man with a conscience, or just a shark who will die when you stop moving forward? - Roderick Vincent

And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

It is simply my life, music. I live it, breathe it, talk with it. I am almost unconscious of it. - Arthur Rubinstein

I think Paul McGuinness and U2 created the Irish music industry. It certainly wasn't there before that. - Van Morrison

I alone of English writers have consciously set myself to make music out of what I may call the sound of sense. - Robert Frost

Music makes one feel so romantic - at least it always gets on one's nerves - which is the same thing nowadays. - Oscar Wilde

Without music to decorate it, time is just a bunch of boring production deadlines or dates by which bills must be paid. - Frank Zappa

Music is the great uniter. An incredible force. Something that people who differ on everything and anything else can have in common. - Sarah Dessen

Take a music bath once or twice a week for a few seasons, and you will find that it is to the soul what the water bath is to the body. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

The great outdoors is a theme with me; a walking holiday in Scotland is perfect - Culloden and the forests of Aviemore are both favourites. - Erin O'Connor

Music embodies feeling without forcing it to contend and combine with thought, as it is forced in most arts and especially in the art of words. - Franz Liszt

I don't like country music, but I don't mean to denigrate those who do. And for the people who like country music, denigrate means put down. - Bob Newhart


Challenge Accepted

Subway Camouflage

In Stitches

Great White

2020 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars (3)

Can I Lick It

It Was A Dark And Stormy Night

Velociraptor Defined

Redneck Muffler Repair

Drama Queen Diary

He Looks Just Like His Father!

Happy Snow Car

Sand Strap Experience

Redneck Calf Feeder

BaCoN T-Shirt

Go Winterized

Car Igloo

Hen Pecked

It's Movie Time

In The Dog House

Diaper Change

Palestinian Security Check

Wurst-Case Scenario

High-Rise Inifinity Pool