Split Screen Viewing

Telegant: Looking good on TV - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

TV: Chewing gum for the eyes. - Frank Lloyd Wright

The vertizontal hold on the TV. - Archie Bunker

Television is democracy at its ugliest. - Paddy Chayefsky

It's the hottest thing on television. - Donald Trump

In television blood is thicker than talent. - Gerald F Lieberman

Ah, TV respects me. It laughs with me, not at me! - Homer Simpson

When I was your age, television was called books. - William Goldman

Babysitters: Girls you hire to watch your television set. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Television has been the single greatest shaper of emptiness. - Ravi Zacharias

When your wife asks what's on TV, dust is not the right answer. - Unknown

Entertainment is a thing of the past, today we've got television. - Archie Bunker

I think Les Moonves is the most highly overrated person in television. - Donald Trump

Men don't care what's on TV. They only care what else is on TV. - Jerry Seinfeld

The human race is faced with a cruel choice: work or daytime television. - Dave Barry

So long as there's a jingle in your head, television isn't free. - Jason Love

Television Programming: Material that fills the time between commercials - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Jogging is for people who aren't intelligent enough to watch television. - Victoria Wood

Television has proved that people will look at anything rather than each other. - Ann Landers

Do you realize if it weren't for Edison we'd be watching TV by candlelight? - Al Boliska

In California, they don't throw their garbage away - they make it into TV shows. - Woody Allen

I hate television. I hate it as much as peanuts. But I can't stop eating peanuts. - Orson Welles

If it weren't for electricity, we'd all be watching television by candlelight. - George Gobel

So many people are on television that don't know me, and they're like experts on me. - Donald Trump

Television has changed the American child from an irresistable force to an immovable object. - Laurence J Peter

Television was not intended to make human beings vacuous, but it is an emanation of their vacuity. - Malcolm Muggeridge

TV and the Internet are good because they keep stupid people from spending too much time out in public. - Douglas Coupland

We owe a lot to Thomas Edison - if it wasn't for him, we'd be watching television by candlelight. - Milton Berle

Television remote controls encourage couch potatoes to exercise their options while broadening their base. - William Arthur Ward

One of television's great contributions is that it brought murder back into the home, where it belongs. - Alfred Hitchcock

When will I learn? The answers to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle, they're on TV! - Homer Simpson

There is no way you can get people to believe you on screen if they know who you really are through television. - Jack Nicholson

If it weren't for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of the television, we'd still be eating frozen radio dinners. - Johnny Carson

Indians are the second largest population in the world, but we're invisible on TV - everything is either black or white. - Russell Peters

Why something in the public interest such as television news can be fought over, like a chain of hamburger stands, eludes me. - Jimmy Breslin

You've probably got a device on you that can shoot decent video, so what's stopping you? Capture and share some moments. - Steve Garfield

We pick politicians by how they look on TV and Miss America on where she stands on the issues. Isn't that a little backwards? - Jay Leno

The perfect date for me would be staying at home, making a big picnic in bed, eating Wotsits and cookies while watching cable TV. - Kim Kardashian

One night I walked home very late and fell asleep in somebody's satellite dish. My dreams were showing up on TV's all over the world. - Steven Wright

I could never have imagined that firing 67 people on national television would actually make me more popular, especially with the younger generation. - Donald Trump