#1 humor site on the 'net

Technology Collision

Fender benders across continents

Technology Collision thanks to Wayne Nowazek

Wheel to wheel survivors survey dent damage

QuotaBills
Last week I forgot how to ride a bicycle. - Steven Wright

Name the greatest of all inventors. Accident. - Mark Twain

Substance is not enough, accident is also required. - Greek Proverb

Stardom isn't a profession, it's an accident. - Lauren Bacall

Feminism is a wonderful idea until the car goes wrong. - Nicola Zweig

A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle. - Gloria Steinem

You should never have more children than you have car windows. - Erma Bombeck

Living with a conscience is like driving a car with the brakes on. - Budd Schulberg

Whenever I see an adult on a bicycle I have hope for the human race. - H G Wells

To attract men, I wear a perfume called "New Car Interior". - Rita Rudner

Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance, you must keep moving. - Albert Einstein

Business is like riding a bicycle. Either you keep moving or you fall down. - John D. Wright

I liked being a teenager, but I would not go back for all the tea in China. - Rob Lowe

A private railroad car is not an acquired taste. One takes to it immediately. - Eleanor R. Belmont

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy

I've exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars. - Erma Bombeck

The lead car is absolutely unique, except for the one behind it which is identical. - Murray Walker

A guy knows he’s in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days. - Tim Allen

A gorilla with a cellphone riding a bicycle is bound to generate some clever captions. - Steve Breen

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

Football isn't a contact sport; it's a collision sport. Dancing is a contact sport. - Vince Lombardi

The dent in his car is hardly cold and he's coming over here to claim his pound of fish. - Archie Bunker

Like a bull into a china closet. Like in that picture, "The Prince and The Porpoise." - Archie Bunker

I took lessons in bicycle riding. But I could only afford half of them. Now I can ride a unicycle. - Steven Wright

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. - Erma Bombeck

When Henry Ford made cheap, reliable cars people said, 'Nah, what's wrong with a horse?' - Elon Musk

I'm going to the backseat of my car with the woman I love, and I won't be back for ten minutes. - Homer Simpson

Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pick-up truck, and end up with a station wagon. - Tim Allen

When walking, you see things that you miss in a motor car or on the train. You give your mind space to ponder. - Tom Hodgkinson

My big focus is China and OPEC and all of these countries that are just absolutely destroying the United States. - Donald Trump

Fantasy is an exercise bicycle for the mind. It might not take you anywhere, but it tones up the muscles that can. - Terry Pratchett

For all of the fights I have had in my life, both on and off the ice, I have only been in the back of a cop car once. - Tie Domi

I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone. - Steven Wright

The actual building of roads devoted to motor cars is not for the near future, in spite of many rumors to that effect. - Harper's Weekly

Toward the north, from there shone Frederick, the North Star, around whom Germany, Europe, even the world seemed to turn. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

I'm not a car guy. The subway gets me where I need to go efficiently and cheaply, and I don't worry about traffic. - Joe Scarborough

A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad. - Theodore Roosevelt

A car hits a Jewish man. The paramedic rushes over and says, "Are you comfortable?" The guy says, "I make a good living." - Henny Youngman

Success is no accident. It is hard work, perseverance, learning, studying, sacrifice and most of all, love of what you are doing or learning to do. - Pele


Prince Bag

Ice Cream Clouds

Sun Dial Fail

Rolling Stop

Ghetto Hammock

Cooking For Guys

Walkies

Ultimate Border Control Protection

Note Flasher

Lineup For Dinner

Do Nothing Day

Horn Blower

Breathe in the Ocean

Skywalking

Low Ceiling Workout

Maxi Boot Sorbet

OCD Highschool

Kona Lisa

Fire Distinguisher

An Apple A Day

2020 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars (3)

Redneck Book Holder

Cold Canada Winter

Snow Reservations