Today's Bathroom Reader

Oh, so they have internet on computers now! - Homer Simpson

I took the initiative in creating the internet. - Al Gore

Always go to the bathroom when you have a chance. - King George V

Man is still the most extraordinary computer of all. - John F Kennedy

Ecrastinate: Checking your e-mail just one more time - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I am not a speed reader.
I am a speed understander. - Isaac Asimov

The e-mail of the species is more deadly than the mail. - Stephen Fry

I would rather sleep in a bathroom than in another hotel. - Billy Wilder

Sleep is so cute when it tries to compete with the internet. - Will Ferrell

Iconomic: Making do with fewer icons on your computer desktop - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer. - Paul Ehrlich

Every bathroom in my house will ultimately have a Toto bidet in it. - Ken Marino

The internet turns 30 minutes of homework into 2 hours of homework. - Unknown

Gutenberg made everybody a reader. Xerox makes everybody a publisher. - Marshall McLuhan

My honeymoon night was spent on the floor in the bathroom with my mother. - Ronnie Spector

I threw the kitchen sink at him, but he went to the bathroom and got his tub. - Andy Roddick

When I was younger I used to lock myself in the bathroom and read in the dry tub. - Karen Russell

Keyboard Plaque: The disgusting buildup of dirt and crud found on computer keyboards - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I'd rather be able to face myself in the bathroom mirror than be rich and famous. - Ani DiFranco

Please leave my computer alone. The only cookies I want to get are the ones I can eat. - Heather Wolf

Keyboard: 1. Place to hang your keys; 2. The standard way to generate computer errors. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

At Disneyland, you never go 'backstage' - even when you're in the bathroom. - Hideo Kojima

With every bathroom renovation, there are three areas that I focus on: budget, function and style. - Candice Olson

I do like to read in bed, but because I have two kids I'm often forced to read in the bathroom. - Eoin Colfer

TV and the Internet are good because they keep stupid people from spending too much time out in public. - Douglas Coupland

Every two months, I would get an email, 'Skeleton Twins update: still don't have the money!' - Bill Hader

I sleep with a light on in the bathroom so I can see where I'm at, because I wake up and have no clue. - Carrie Underwood

I use a computer. I don't know if that qualifies me as a techie, but I'm pretty good on the computer. - Leonard Nimoy

The Internet has turned what used to be a controlled, one-way message into a real-time dialogue with millions. - Danielle Sacks

They've finally come up with the perfect office computer. If it makes a mistake, it blames another computer. - Milton Berle

From sixdegrees to Friendster to Facebook, social networking has become a familiar and ubiquitous part of the Internet. - David Kirkpatrick

The best measure of a man's honesty isn't his income tax return. It's the zero adjust on his bathroom scale. - Arthur C. Clarke

The protean nature of the computer is such that it can act like a machine or like a language to be shaped and exploited. - Alan Kay

I took a course in speed reading. Then I got Reader's Digest on microfilm. By the time I got the machine set up, I was done. - Steven Wright

I wish I had a nickel for every song that I've left in the bathroom, written down on a matchbox, or just totally forgotten about. - Tommy Shaw

As a travel writer I've specialized in gritty, fearful destinations, the kind of places that make a reader's hair stick on end. - Tahir Shah

For the past 10 years, corporations have been trained that they should use all the different media. But the Internet is becoming the umbrella. - Larry Weber

Cell phones, mobile e-mail, and all the other cool and slick gadgets can cause massive losses in our creative output and overall productivity. - Robin S Sharma

Making duplicate copies and computer printouts of things no one wanted even one of in the first place is giving America a new sense of purpose. - Andy Rooney

My wife was a make-up artist, and she's a total product junkie. Our bathroom is packed full of lotions and potions so I end up trying them out. - Robert Carlyle