Tree Stump Table

A little axe can cut down a big tree. - Jamaican Saying

My family tree could use some pruning. - Unknown

The righteous will flourish like the palm tree. - Psalms 92:12

Trees cause more pollution than automobiles do. - Ronald Reagan

At a round table there is no dispute about place. - Italian Proverb

A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree. - Spike Milligan

The best cure for sea sickness, is to sit under a tree. - Spike Milligan

I looked up my family tree and found out I was the sap. - Rodney Dangerfield

Preoccupied with a single leaf you won't see the tree. - Vagabond

I think that I shall never see
A poem lovely as a tree. - Joyce Kilmer

Native ability without education is like a tree without fruit. - Aristippus

I ordered a bed from IKEA and they sent me a tree trunk and a saw. - Eileen Curtright

Death is nature's way of saying, "Your table is ready." - Robin Williams

The man who can dominate a London dinner-table can dominate the world. - Oscar Wilde

The colder the X-Ray table, the more of your body is required to be on it. - Steven Wright

Thirteen at a table is unlucky only when the hostess has only twelve chops. - Groucho Marx

The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now. - Chinese Proverb

Death is just a low chemical trick played on everybody except sequoia trees. - J.J. Furnas

I went to a haunted house, looked under the kitchen table, and found spirit gum. - Steven Wright

Someone told me I was immature. Guess who's not allowed in my tree house now? - Unknown

If my Valentine you won't be,
I'll hang myself on your Christmas tree. - Ernest Hemingway

The true meaning of life is to plant trees, under whose shade you do not expect to sit. - Nelson Henderson

A half finished shawl left on the coffee table isn't a mess; it's an object of art. - Stephanie Pearl-McPhee

Transplanting the ballet to the United States is like trying to raise a palm tree in Dakota. - Lincoln Kirsten

Bad Luck: To have thirteen people seated at the table when you’re paying for the drinks - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

If I had six hours to chop down a tree, I'd spend the first four hours sharpening the axe. - Abraham Lincoln

The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants. - Thomas Jefferson

I still have my Christmas Tree. I looked at it today. Sure enough, I couldn't see any forests. - Steven Wright

My wife is on a diet. Coconuts and bananas. She hasn't lost any weight, but she can sure climb a tree. - Henny Youngman

May I never be drunk enough to try to play a foosball table alone like that dude over there who actually is. - Dr. Okay Times

Except during the nine months before he draws his first breath, no man manages his affairs as well as a tree does. - George Bernard Shaw

It's in the democratic citizen's nature to be like a leaf that doesn't believe in the tree it's part of. - David Foster Wallace

You can't be suspicious of a tree, or accuse a bird or a squirrel of subversion or challenge the ideology of a violet. - Hal Borland

As the poet said, "Only God can make a tree" - probably because it's so hard to figure out how to get the bark on. - Woody Allen

On the top of the Crumpetty Tree
The Quangle Wangle sat,
But his face you could not see,
On account of his Beaver Hat. - Edward Lear

Wolves directly affect the entire ecosystem, not just moose populations, their main prey, because less moose equals more tree growth. - Rolf Peterson

Only when the last tree has withered, and the last fish caught, and the last river been poisoned, will we realize we cannot eat money. - Cree Proverb

Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it was stupid. - Albert Einstein

You need the kind of objectivity that makes you forget everything you've heard, clear the table, and do a factual study like a scientist would. - Steve Wozniak

Advice from a tree:
- Stand tall and proud
- Go out on a limb
- Remember your roots
- Drink plenty of water
- Enjoy the view - Unknown