#1 humor site on the 'net

Waiting For Spring in Canada

Why Canadians don't stop too long for coffee at Timmy's

Waiting For Spring in Canada thanks to Wayne Nowazek

Joe forgot to bring along his de-icing equipment

QuotaBills
Ice Cream: What I do when scared - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Revenge is a dish best served cold. - Italian Proverb

Relief: What trees do in the spring - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Blossom by blossom the spring begins. - Algernon C Swinburne

The perfect man? A poet on a motorcycle. - Lucinda Williams

Spring is the time of plans and projects. - Leo Tolstoy

Room service - don't send up any more ice. - WC Fields

Despite the forecast, live like it's spring. - Lilly Pulitzer

Some say the world will end in fire, some say in ice. - Robert Frost

I drank the silence of God from a spring in the woods. - Georg Trakl

A diamond is the only kind of ice that keeps a girl warm. - Elizabeth Taylor

Harlez Vous Francais?: Can you drive a French motorcycle? - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I don't jog. It makes the ice jump right out of my glass. - David Lee Roth

A heresy can spring only from a system that is in full vigor. - Eric Hoffer

Can words describe the fragrance of the very breath of spring? - Neltje Blanchan

You don't need a weatherman to know which way the wind blows. - Bob Dylan

If you're already walking on thin ice, you might as well dance. - Proverb

Sadness is more or less like a head cold - with patience, it passes. - Barbara Kingsolver

Everybody talks about the weather, but nobody does anything about it. - Charles Dudley Warner

Creative play is like a spring that bubbles up from deep within a child. - Joan Almon

People who take cold baths never have rheumatism, but they have cold baths. - American Proverb

Wherever you go, no matter what the weather, always bring your own sunshine. - Anthony J. D'Angelo

News events are like Texas weather. If you don't like it, wait a minute. - Jessica Savitch

Whiskey is by far the most popular of all remedies that won't cure a cold. - Jerry Vale

Always give them the old fire, even when you feel like a squashed cake of ice. - Ethel Merman

When it gets hot like this, you know what I do? I keep my undies in the ice box. - Marilyn Monroe

I stuck my head out the window this morning and spring kissed my bang in the face. - Langston Hughes

My mother is no spring chicken although she has got as many chemicals in her as one. - Edna Everage

Even bees, the little almsmen of spring bowers, know there is richest juice in poison-flowers. - John Keats

The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing. - Steven Wright

It's not my fault I was dragged out of my house by a mob and forced to predict the weather. - Punxsutawney Phil

Age does not diminish the extreme disappointment of having a scoop of ice cream fall from the cone. - Jim Fiebig

Italy, and the spring and first love all together should suffice to make the gloomiest person happy. - Bertrand Russell

I believe Ronald Reagan can make this country what it once was... a large Arctic region covered with ice. - Robin Williams

People are more violently opposed to fur than leather because it's safer to harass rich women than motorcycle gangs. - Unknown

Don't knock the weather. Nine-tenths of the people couldn't start a conversation if it didn't change once in a while. - Kin Hubbard

I glanced out the window at the signs of spring. The sky was almost blue, the trees were almost budding, the sun was almost bright. - Millard Kaufman

The long, dull, monotonous years of middle-aged prosperity or middle-aged adversity are excellent campaigning weather for the devil. - C S Lewis

My advice to you is not to inquire why or whither, but just enjoy your ice cream while it's on your plate - that's my philosophy. - Thornton Wilder

NBC News just called it "The Great Freeze" - coldest weather in years. Is our country still spending money on the global warming hoax? - Donald Trump


Bacon Wrapped Onion Rings

T-Rex Shadow

Camel Parking

Cheat of the Year

Born To Be Wild

Why I Wear 2 Masks

Welfare State

Redneck Wedding Cake

Blonde Gears

Party Direction Sign

House 'Broke'rage

'Piece of Cake' Resignation Letter

Bee Safe

Catfish Noodling

I'm A Believer

Sewing Sculpture

Greatest Italian Riders

Batman Recession

Sinus Remedy - How To Clear Out Your Nostrils

About Grandparents

Split Personality Ad

Happy Bithday

Back 2 School Savings

Redneck Wine Dispenser