British League of Pessimists

Stress makes you stupid. - Unknown

Scotland is the Canada of England. - Rainn Wilson

I speak two languages, English and Body. - Mae West

When Irish eyes are smiling, watch your step. - Gerald Kersh

Britain's goal is not to survive, but to prevail. - Winston Churchill

A weeping man and a smiling woman are not to be trusted. - Indian Proverb

The English winter - ending in July, to recommence in August. - Lord Byron

Don't cry because it's over; smile because it happened. - Dr. Seuss

Smile. It will bring serenity to the most stressful situations. - Garnet Hill

It's easy to smile when you have a squirrel's intellect. - Dylan Moran

Reality: The leading cause of stress among those in touch with it. - Lily Tomlin

England and America are two countries separated by a common language. - George Bernard Shaw

A diamond is just a piece of coal that handles stress exceptionally well. - Unknown

Optimist: someone who tells you to cheer up when things are going his way. - Edward Murrow

Don't let the world change your smile, let your smile change the world. - Unknown

God will never give you anything you can't handle, so don't stress. - Kelly Clarkson

Pessimists are usually kind. The gay, bubbling over, have no time for the pitiful. - Sean O'Faolain

My pessimism extends to the point of even suspecting the sincerity of the pessimists. - Jean Rostand

Laughter is a uniting force; it brings people together, and it makes hardship easier. - Montaigne

Stress is your body's way of saying you haven't worked enough unpaid overtime. - Scott Adams

An optimist sees opportunity in every danger; the pessimist sees danger in every opportunity. - Winston Churchill

Ireland is a small but insuppressible island half an hour nearer the sunset than Great Britain. - Thomas Kettle

Never trust people who smile constantly. They're either selling something or not very bright. - Laurell K Hamilton

Lighten up, just enjoy life, smile more, laugh more, and don't get so worked up about things. - Kenneth Branagh

Sometimes your joy is the source of your smile, but sometimes your smile can be the source of your joy. - Thich Nhat Hanh

The English country gentleman galloping after a fox - the unspeakable in full pursuit of the uneatable. - Oscar Wilde

"Burn everything British," he once advised his Irish countrymen, "except their coal." - Jonathan Swift

The point of living, and of being an optimist, is to be foolish enough to believe the best is yet to come. - Peter Ustinov

I alone of English writers have consciously set myself to make music out of what I may call the sound of sense. - Robert Frost

An optimist stays up until midnight to see the New Year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves. - Bill Vaughan

You know when you have found your prince because you not only have a smile on your face but in your heart as well. - Unknown

The pessimist complains about the wind. The optimist expects it to change. The leader (realist) adjusts the sails. - John C Maxwell

The longest word in the English language is the one following the phrase, "And now a word from our sponsor." - Hal Eaton

I'm not just retiring from the company, I'm also retiring from my stress, my commute, my alarm clock, and my iron. - Hartman Jule

Laughter is healing and helpful and fun, and I see my role as an entertainer, and I want readers to leave my books smiling. - Gail Carriger

There's something about a woman with a loud mind that sits in silence, smiling, knowing she can crush you with the truth. - R G Moon

The nine most terrifying words in the English language are,
"I'm from the government and I'm here to help." - Ronald Reagan

Cricket - a game which the English, not being a spiritual people, have invented in order to give themselves some conception of eternity. - Lord Mancroft

It is quite untrue that British people don't appreciate music. They may not understand it but they absolutely love the noise it makes. - Sir Thomas Beecham

Paul Revere was warning the British about gun control, and George Washington apparently was crossing the Delaware to bomb an abortion clinic. - Bill Maher