Canadian Trap

Hockey's my favorite sport. - Denis Leary

Hockey is the original extreme sport. - Tom Ward

Hockey is figure skating in a war zone. - Unknown

To succeed in hockey, you need teamwork. - Henry Samueli

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. - Unknown

You can never buy beer, you just rent it. - Archie Bunker

Beer. Now there's a temporary solution. - Homer Simpson

Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world. - Jack Nicholson

Some guys play hockey. Gretzky plays 40-mph chess. - Lowell Cohn

The mouse that fears the trap has already been trapped. - Marty Rubin

Figure skaters have awful perceptions of hockey players. - Kristi Yamaguchi

What two ideas are more inseparable than Beer and Britannia? - Sydney Smith

I'm only a beer teetotaller, not a champagne teetotaller. - George Bernard Shaw

I never drank anything stronger than beer before I was twelve. - WC Fields

I went to a fight the other night, and a hockey game broke out. - Rodney Dangerfield

All hockey players are bilingual. They know English and profanity. - Gordie Howe

The greatest hockey player who ever lived: Bobby Orr, and I love him. - Donald S. Cherry

I love hockey because of the respect for history and for the game itself. - George Vecsey

My goal was to play in the NHL, because that is the best hockey in the world. - Jaromir Jagr

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin

When you think of hockey, when you think of Canada, you think of Wayne Gretzky. - Joe Sakic

I still have my teeth. I don't want to lose them at age 61 in some hockey game. - Jim Flaherty

Kidney: 1. Midpoint of a child's leg; 2. An organ used to convert beer into urine. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx

I'm not a hockey fan, which is probably why I had to leave Canada in the first place. - Ryan Reynolds

I never looked at hockey as work. Now that I'd finished playing, I had to go to work. - Bobby Orr

I like ice hockey. No one is ever going to ask me to write about that as a metaphor for life. - Steven Pinker

An Irishman after trying American beer for the first time: "Put it back in the horse!" - Unknown

You do not play hockey for good seasons. You play to win the Stanley Cup. It has to be the objective. - Guy Lafleur

I love those hockey moms. You know what they say the difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull is? Lipstick. - Sarah Palin

I have a huge interest in hockey because I grew up in Canada, where it's kind of the law that you love hockey. - Matthew Perry

I went to a Catholic boys' school for a year, but that was to play hockey. Religion class was quite contentious for me. - Keanu Reeves

I still play hockey every now and then, and I still golf. But my biggest exercise is walking my big dog in the park every day. - Michael J. Fox

Hockey on roller skates is like MMA in a bounce house: the elements are there, but the medium makes the whole thing ridiculous. - David Walton

When it comes to hockey, it's been in my blood since I was 3 or 4 years old. I love coaching the kids, especially at that level. - Mario Lemieux

Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry

Baseball happens to be a game of cumulative tension but football, basketball and hockey are played with hand grenades and machine guns. - John Leonard

NASA's robot Curiosity landed on Mars. Early pictures show no signs of ESPN or beer. This makes it very clear that men are not from Mars. - Unknown

I found my prince - he's a hockey player and we met at an NHL event, the last place I'd ever expect to meet someone, but there he was. - Carol Alt

If you sang "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall" and counted all the numbers mentioned throughout the entire song, it would add up to 14,850. - Joe-kster